Oscillation is one of the best-kept secrets in human influence.None of the
gurus of persuasion or influence will talk about oscillation (and they may
not know what it is).
Very few people who understand belief and behavior oscillation want
anyone else to grasp the concept. Oscillating beliefs and values are key in
successfully understanding and persuading others.
As you learn about managing oscillation in others I want you to keep
the following in mind:
Core concept:“Yes” is not a true decision. It is agreement or affirma-
tion to a proposal at a particular instant in time . . . and you had best seize
the moment.
Had you asked for a response five minutes earlier or later you almost
certainly would have gotten a different answer, regardless of what the
question was!
Remember when you were 16 or 26 and you were in that moment
when you probably were going to be intimate with someone else? Your
heart pounded.You knew you could get pregnant, or get her pregnant, or
get AIDS or syphilis.You had always thought you believed that you would
never have unprotected or possibly premarital sex. Perhaps you:
I
Thought it was wrong.
I
Knew it was against your religion.
I
Would never take the risk of acquiring a life-threatening disease.
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Would never take the risk of pregnancy.
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Believed you should wait to have sex until you were married.
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Were waiting for the right person.
Remember? Your beliefs were strong. Firm. Written in stone. You
could have preached a sermon about whichever of these beliefs you held
close and lived by. (If this specific example is foreign to you, simply think
of the other firm beliefs you had that you violated within a matter of sec-
onds or minutes of first considering doing so.)
And then you were in the moment.And you had this experience that
was something you knew you wouldn’t do but you did. Upon reflection,
you were surprised at your behavior. Perhaps you were shocked.You now
had to try to justify your actions in some way or determine that what you
originally believed was wrong.An internal mess. Remember?
Let’s examine what happened on that day:
1. You held a powerful, intense, unwavering belief for a long time.
2. You knew that you would never behave in a different fashion than
what you believed.
3. With only minutes of consideration, you violated a belief you had
had for years and perhaps for your entire life.
4. Afterward you wondered if you really knew who you were, or
worse, you experienced tons of guilt because you so easily and in-
stantly wavered on something that was a belief that defined who
you were.
You had never oscillated or vacillated about this remarkable subject in
the past.You were always absolutely certain about what you believed and
how you felt.You knew you could never behave in any other way than
what you valued and believed. It was as impossible as a man reaching the
moon in the 1960s.
And then you did “it.”
How is that possible?
I use this extreme example to begin our discussion of oscillation be-
cause in this example there is essentially no oscillation until the minutes
before the moment.Then all of a sudden the wavering begins and it is of-
ten experienced as scary because conflicting beliefs now begin to enter the
mind. Back and forth, pro and con. Strong feelings/emotions overcome
what we might call “rational thought,” and a lifetime of certainty is trans-
formed after minutes of oscillation to a completely different behavior.
In this case, first there is no oscillation, then there is a burst of oscil-
lation and indecision (often accompanied by confusion), and then a spe-
cific behavior occurs. After the behavior, something must happen to
make the individual whole or congruent again.The person must recon-
cile the behavior with the previous beliefs by either establishing new be-
liefs, condemning themselves, or returning to their old beliefs with a
renewed vigor realizing they have “not been themselves.”The oscillations
after the behavior are often as dramatic as or more dramatic than those
prior to the behavior.
What follows is a completely different example that illustrates this
critical point.
(If you don’t understand football, you may want to forgive me in ad-
vance and dig in for the next four paragraphs.)
When I first looked at the January 2003 Super Bowl to handicap it, I
determined the number should be Oakland –3 at a neutral site.San Diego
isn’t really quite neutral, as the proximity to the Bay Area versus Florida
certainly favors Oakland. I thought the number should be bumped a
point or two, perhaps to as much as 5. In Vegas the number opened at 5
and got bet by the pros (smart-money betters) down to 4 where it stayed
until Sunday.
I have a model I use to handicap football games. One of the key ele-
ments that had led me to pick New England the year before was the likely
number of turnovers in the game. (The other most important factors are
yards per pass for/against.) In 2003, I concluded,Tampa Bay should be the
recipient of about one more interception than Oakland.That means if the
two teams played millions of times,Tampa would win about 55 to 60 per-
cent of the time. So, my money goes on Tampa Bay. (There are other fac-
tors that are analyzed in this tough-to-call game, but that isn’t the point of
this article!)
As soon as I laid a significant number of dollars on Tampa Bay, my
mind started to find additional data to support the decision to bet Tampa
Bay. Now as I thought about it, 9 out of 10 of my thoughts supported my
decision to bet Tampa. This large volume of unconscious justification
about a decision that is almost a flip of a coin in true probability is un-
called-for based on real world evidence.My emotions started to selectively
filter out reasons to bet on Oakland and support my expensive choice of
betting on Tampa Bay.
It took me six hours to finally bet the amount of money I did. I vacil-
lated between taking the offensive Oakland scoring machine versus the
solid as a rock (Tampa) defense. Back and forth.Then when my gut said
Tampa more often than not, I ran the numbers and they also pointed to
Tampa Bay.Then as time went on in the week, I became more certain—
which of course was only an illusion because it wasn’t based on real-world
evidence, only on feelings and justifications. (In this case Tampa was kind
enough to actually win and allow me another problem, which is believing
I am better/smarter than I really am! But, that’s okay—I got paid.
Here’s what happens:There is typically an arbitrary decision point that is
set in almost every negotiation/communication/decision. (“I have to
know today.”“If we don’t have a deal by the 31st, I let someone else have
it.”“If you buy today you get 10 percent off.”) A decision needs to be or
probably will be made. In some cases, if an obvious decision isn’t instantly
made (yes, I will pull over for the police officer because I don’t want this
ticket to be higher than it is now) things could get worse.Almost all deci-
sions that require conscious thought (most decisions require no thought or
conscious attention at all) find people oscillating back and forth as to what
to do, especially before the decision point.
Realize that people would make a very different decision at 5:00
P
.
M
.
than at 5:05
P
.
M
. on something that goes back and forth a lot in the mind!
People literally change their mind as each moment passes in many deci-
sions. Unless people have firm beliefs as discussed earlier in the decision
about having sex, people are constantly oscillating on decisions. Back and
forth. Back and forth. Sometimes with varying degrees of intensity.“No,
absolutely not.”That was today.Then tomorrow,“Well, maybe.”Then the
next day:“I don’t think so, but it’s possible.”
You can see the pendulum swing back and forth, or the child on the
swing go higher or lower. More important for our discussion is that oscil-
lation is not a day-to-day experience. It is a moment-to-moment experi-
ence.“Yes”and “no”in varying degrees flip-flop from moment to moment
and minute to minute.
The oscillation will continue indefinitely unless a new stimulus enters
the equation—and then any change is subject to further change.
Once persuaded to do anything, there is definitely short-term change
in behavior. Instead of doing one thing, a person does another. Instead of
believing one thing, a person believes another. Nevertheless, people can
and do regularly change even strong beliefs.The more public a person is
with their belief/behavior, the more likely they are to maintain that belief.
(The minister of the church is more likely to maintain his belief than the
parishioner sitting in row 30 because of the weekly public exposition of
his beliefs through sermons and prayers.)
Beliefs and behaviors that are not made public are more likely to
change due to future attempts at persuasion.
Someone who begins a diet plan and attends classes or meetings is
likely to continue to succeed while attending the classes. As soon as the
person stops attending the classes or going to the meetings,the chances are
greatly increased that they will stop their weight control program and re-
vert to old beliefs and behaviors.
The more people there are who have opinions and the more important those
people’s opinions about a person are, the more powerful the desire one has to keep
the new belief or behavior consistent with the new belief.
Key Question: Is there anything we can predict will happen after a per-
son has been persuaded?
Yes. Once someone has been persuaded there is a very good chance
they will go through oscillations of regret, sometimes so great that they
will actually immediately change their mind again and cancel a purchase
or not take a job they thought they should, for example.
You can virtually eliminate this specific reaction through the uti-
lization of principles that allow someone to anticipate their regret prior
to the decision point so that when they experience the change of be-
lief/behavior they will be expecting it and will react in a less intense
fashion.
Did the firefighters need to be persuaded on 9/11? Did they experi-
ence oscillation?
You hire an account to do your books and reduce your taxes.
Your personal trainer’s job is to get rid of your gut.
The chef? To cook.
A police officer? To protect public safety.
But what happens when an airplane flies into a building? What hap-
pens inside of the mind of the firefighter who is racing upstairs while
everyone else is going down?
Specifically there is no way to know. Even the firefighters who lived
could only report what they think they remembered and thought at the
time of the most incredible crisis imaginable, reminiscent of D-Day in
some ways. Firefighters train for disasters but they usually have a sense of
control about their own safety. Going into the World Trade Center was
quite another thing.
We know that many office workers trapped in the buildings who were
about to lose their lives called loved ones.The same was true for the pas-
sengers on the flight that was heroically downed in Pennsylvania that fate-
ful day. We do know that oscillation probably takes place in these
extraordinary circumstances.The desire to be with loved ones.The desire
to live. Being able to live your life in the way you choose and ultimately
die doing that which you love. I imagine there was oscillation and it was
fairly rapidly dismissed by the objective, the task at hand.
Veterans of war no doubt experienced similar feelings, thoughts, and
oscillations. But what about the more mundane? Buying a car? Saying
“yes” or “no” to the request for a date? Saying “yes” or “no” to the mar-
riage proposal?
There is ample evidence that reveals that the closer one comes to a goal or
an objective (the wedding day, for example) the more likely one is to experience
regret.
As humans we experience fear and anxiety responses when we lose
the “freedom options.”That’s one reason ordering fish or fowl can be such
a difficult problem! As soon as a decision is near, anxiety can incapacitate a
person, even on little decisions about what to eat in a restaurant.
In fact,reams of research indicate this repulsion to the goal is great as it
is approached in many contexts.This often leads to self-sabotage and other
destructive behaviors.
This is why people say they would like to invest in their 401(k) plan
next year but if they were asked to make a deposit today they would not
do so!
Oscillation is not indecisiveness per se. It is a normal and often useful
reaction to situations that have unknown variables.
I
Oscillation is wavering between two or more possibilities.
I
The wavering can become more intense as the deadline looms.
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The anxiety and fear level increases as the deadline comes closer.
I
The desire to move away from any choice that limits future free-
dom of choice in any way increases as a decision point nears.
A woman who is in love with two men chooses man A. (Men do not
choose women, regardless of what religion or theory of evolution you
subscribe to that tells you otherwise.) She decides,“I will spend my life
with Andrew.” But as she comes closer and closer to actually spending
the rest of her life with Andrew, she begins to wonder if she has made a
big mistake and starts to seriously reconsider Bill! Sure, she dumped Bill
a month ago, but really, when she thinks about it, Bill is probably the bet-
ter choice.
This oscillation doesn’t just happen with women. My mom regularly
told me that it’s a woman’s prerogative to change her mind. I always
thought that was a lousy excuse. It turns out to be true, though, except
that everyone changes their minds! Most people change their minds as the
goal approaches or the other options have been rejected.
Sometimes these oscillations are manifested in behavior. Sometimes
they are not. Either way, they are happening in the mind of the individual.
According to Fink, Kaplowitz, and Hubbard (2002), oscillation (wa-
vering) increases when the person or message doing the persuading is per-
ceived as credible.When someone is believable and states an opinion that
isn’t consistent with what the individual currently believes, credibility be-
comes a critical issue.
The power of the argument/message is also critical.A well-framed argu-
ment will cause people’s minds to waver between options.Consider the State
of the Union speech by President George W. Bush at the end of January
2003. Bush faced great opposition on his objective of attacking Iraq. In the
State of the Union, Bush could not provide the “smoking gun” that many
wanted,so he provided a logical line of thinking that was difficult to refute.I
paraphrase: There were 30,000 missiles that could be used to carry weapons of mass
destruction. Sixteen have been found.Where are the other 29,984?
Indeed.Where were they? Bush clearly and concisely stated the facts
of what weapons Iraq had at the end of 1998 and then claimed to reveal
what Iraq had not declared.The strategy essentially worked, as 84 percent
of the nation had a positive view of the speech. Doubts remained (that is
part of what oscillation will always yield!),and perhaps we will never know
all the facts. But one thing is certain:The strength of a well-stated argu-
ment can cause oscillation. The stronger the argument, the greater and
more frequent the oscillation.This means:The more powerful the argu-
ment,the more often the person will vacillate between beliefs/choices and
the more real both choices become.
What about the 16 percent who weren’t convinced and who didn’t
seem to waver at all? Perhaps they did.Perhaps not.Certainly if their opin-
ion was written in stone they simply didn’t oscillate at all. However, re-
member the option of having sex or not and how most did so? That was
written in stone.
Wavering between two or more options occurs when something is
important. Someone hates their job but they want to keep their income,
which is high when compared with jobs the person would qualify for
should they leave their current job.
Stay Go
Hate job, well paid. Less money, more enjoyable work.
This is an important issue and oscillation could occur dozens of times
per hour,day,week,month,and year.Oscillation will generally not happen
to any significant degree in issues that are not important to the person.
Why would a millionaire care if a cup of coffee is $2 or $1? She probably
wouldn’t and thus wouldn’t waver. Generally speaking, an issue has to be
important to engender vacillation.You can tell when you are oscillating
when you feel torn or you feel like you are being pulled in two directions.
Generally risk is involved.Staying with the job entails the risk of never
enjoying other aspects of life. Going entails the risk of never having the
money you have now. People oscillate when something is important and
entails tangible risks both in the change and in the status quo.
dimanche 17 décembre 2006
Applying the Laws of Influence
You drive down the street.You have to stop at stop signs, yield to oncom-
ing traffic, and even keep to the speed limit (at least when you see a high-
way patrolman!).These are all simple laws. Laws created by society for the
safety and betterment of the masses aren’t necessarily perfect, nor are they
absolutes. Laws of society don’t always work.
However, universal laws like the law of gravity always work. If you
drop 10,000 baseballs off the top of the Sears Tower in Chicago, the balls
will all drop to the street below, probably doing major damage. None of
the balls will rise up toward the atmosphere as you drop them off the
Sears Tower.
These are universal laws that never change. If you try to break a uni-
versal law, normally you won’t get a second chance to make things right!
Legislated laws are different. If you follow them you will probably live
longer and pay fewer traffic tickets.
The laws of influence aren’t quite like the laws of society or the laws
of the universe. In fact, most people aren’t even aware of the laws of influ-
ence.They simply tend to act in accordance with the laws at a completely
unconscious level.There are major prices to pay when the laws of influ-
ence are broken.The problem is that most people aren’t aware of the laws
in the first place.If people unconsciously follow the rules they will be hap-
pier and communicate well with others. If people don’t follow the rules
they will run into lots of problems, experience broken relationships, earn
less income, be more readily downsized in corporations that are cutting
back, and—well, you get the idea.
There is nothing you do that is more important than communicat-
ing with others. There are very specific laws that govern not only the
communication process but also the sales process. It’s interesting because
sometimes when you drive past the highway patrolman at 75 mph you
don’t get a ticket. Sometimes you fail to yield to oncoming traffic and
you don’t get in a car accident. Every now and then you run the stop
sign and you don’t hit a pedestrian. The laws exist, though, and when
they are followed they tend to work in favor of law-abiding citizens.
When they are broken, the chances that something will go wrong are
dramatically increased. The same is true in this respect for the laws of
influence.
How can there be laws of selling? How can something like sales or
communication have laws? As our species has evolved for millions of years
we have discovered that we tend to need the cooperation of others to suc-
ceed. Gaining the cooperation and compliance of other people is ab-
solutely critical to the persuasion process and the continuance of society as
we know it.
In this chapter you will learn how to apply the 10 Laws of Influ-
ence. Following each of these rules is important in gaining compliance
from others. In most situations on most days of your sales career, if you
follow each law you will find selling to be a fairly simple experience.
What’s better, if you utilize these 10 laws in all of your communication
you will find that your sales career is fun, sometimes challenging, and al-
ways rewarding.
1. Law of Reciprocity
When someone gives you something of perceived value, you immediately
respond with the desire to give something back.
It’s December 24 and the mail has just arrived.You open a Christmas
card from someone you had taken off your Christmas list.This is a crisis!
“Honey, are there any more Christmas cards left?”
“Yeah, in the drawer.”
“Thank God.”You go to the drawer and sure enough there is a card
there—but there are no envelopes to fit the card into! You search and
search,finally deciding to use an envelope that isn’t quite large enough . . .
but you have to use something!
You sign the card, and yes, you personalize it! (You write something
special just for the sender.) You stuff the card into the envelope that is still
too small.You slide a picture of the family in, and you even find a leftover
newsletter that tells everyone what your family has been up to all year.
“I’ll be back in a while, I have to go to the post office and mail this
card.”
Why do you have to go to the post office?
You have to go because the letter must be mailed with a postmark be-
fore Christmas! December 24 will show that you cared. December 26 will
show that these people were an afterthought in your mind, not worthy of
sending a card to before Christmas.You race off to the post office—and
you have just discovered the power of reciprocity.
You were taught to share your toys and your snacks and your space
and your time with all those around you.You were scolded when you
were selfish and you were rewarded with kind smiles and pats on the
head when you shared.The Law of Reciprocity was installed at a very
early age.
The world’s greatest people and marketing mavens give something to
their clients—and I don’t mean a business card.
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Have you ever received a bar of soap in the mail?
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Have you ever received a box of cereal in the mail?
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Have you ever received return address labels from a charity in the
mail?
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Have you ever received a handful of greeting cards from a charity in
the mail?
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Have you ever received a sample-size shampoo bottle in the mail?
These are all examples of what we call “inducing reciprocity.” The
practice is very simple, yet absolutely brilliant. If your product is top qual-
ity and it is something that everyone can use,send everyone a small sample
of it, and they will be more likely to buy it the next time they go to the
store for two reasons.
First, they will recognize it as something they have used. The brain
picks up on what is familiar. (Have you ever noticed how many cars there
are like yours on the road? What happened to all the rest?!)
Second, reciprocity has been induced when someone gives you some-
thing and you give them something back. Reciprocity has also been in-
duced when someone gives you something and you feel compelled to give
something back.Kellogg’s was nice enough to send us their free box of ce-
real, and because it tasted good we should at least buy their cereal this one
time.We return the favor.
Reciprocity, based on scientific research, appears to be the single most
powerful law of selling persuasion there is, but is there a problem?
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If you sell life insurance, you can’t give away $10,000 of free cover-
age.
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If you sell real estate, you can’t give away bathrooms.
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If you sell speaking services you can’t give away free speeches.
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If you are a stockbroker you can’t give away 100 shares of Mi-
crosoft.
What do you do if you don’t have sample-size products or services?
How do you take advantage of this powerful law of share and share
alike?
You do not have to give away free samples to utilize reciprocity.You
must only give away something that has perceived value. My favorite
method of inducing reciprocity is taking someone to lunch or sharing a
valuable tip related to building their business or income in some way. (I
like these approaches because they are measurable and the person knows
that you really helped them when they follow through on your sugges-
tion.) Taking someone to lunch is usually an inexpensive way to induce
reciprocity, and you have the added benefit of meeting one of your client’s
16 basic desires (the desire to eat). Sharing helpful secrets that are truly
specialized knowledge is also an elegant way to induce reciprocity. One
simple idea can often help someone earn hundreds or thousands of dollars
per year more in income.
Can I share a secret with you?
I keep some of my money in the Strong Funds Money Market ac-
count. It pays much more interest than a bank does and the money is safe.
You can write checks on your account just like a checking account, and if
you just used that secret to make more money, I’d be happy that I shared it
with you.
Can I share another secret with you? The Strong Advantage Fund is
even better! It pays about 1 to 3 percent more interest than the Strong
Money Market Fund and you can write checks on that account, too. If
you took $10,000 out of the bank or CD and put it into the Strong Ad-
vantage Fund you would earn 2 to 3 percent more interest per year on that
money than you do in the bank or CD. Now, granted that only comes to
about $300 per year, but how many free copies of this book can you give
away to your friends in return for that one $300 gift? How will your
friends feel about you when you give them the most cutting-edge selling
power ever put into one book?
Here are a few creative ideas for people to use as inexpensive giveaway
items.
Life Insurance and Financial Products
Give away a free report that lists all of the top-performing investments for
the past three years (even if it contains information that is positive about
your competitors!).Give away a handy chart that people can place on the re-
frigerator that shows the 10 questions to ask telemarketers to determine the
legitimacy of investment opportunities and requests for charitable donations.
Real Estate
Estimate the dollar of the loan the client will take out and run several
amortization tables showing how small extra payments each month will
cut years off the life of the loan,save the client tens of thousands of dollars,
and create long-term financial freedom. If the client is already putting
every penny toward the 30-year mortgage, give away a handy booklet that
shows how to do simple maintenance on the house, how to find good ser-
vice people to work on the home in the future, and how to keep the
home in top-dollar condition should they decide to sell.
Automobile
If you sell a great car, give away a recent Consumer Reports article compar-
ing your car with others in its class. If you sell a car that is a good car but
not listed as one of the best,give away a list of the top 10 strategies to keep
the car running cheaply and its resale value high.
The message to you is that everyone can give something away for free
with nothing expected in return. It is a scientific fact that reciprocity is
effective.The key is that what you give away must have perceived value
on the part of the client.Traditional promotional items like personalized
pens and date books may be useful or they may not be.You can test them
to see if they assist in making sales. It doesn’t matter what your giveaway
actually costs you.What matters is the value the client places on the item,
report, or product.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Reciprocity when selling your
products or services? Be very specific.
2. Law of Time
Changing someone’s time perspective helps them to make different deci-
sions.When people change their time perspective they change how they
feel about something and the decisions they make in regard to it.
Time is the subtle equalizer in life. No matter how rich or poor you
are,time is the one commodity that is the same for everyone.Everyone has
this moment of experience only. What happens in this moment is nor-
mally not a matter of conscious choice or thought.
Quite often when you walk into a client’s office or you contact them
in some other way they will immediately equate you, at the unconscious
level,with all of the other people they have ever met.In all probability they
have more negative experiences than positive experiences with people.
Two things need to happen.You must distinguish yourself from all the
other people they’ve known, and you need to move their time filter from
the past to the present or future. People have emotional responses that are
attached to various stimuli.You are a stimulus.You trigger positive or neg-
ative experiences in all of your clients’ minds whether or not each client
knows it. What’s more interesting is that this response isn’t necessarily
linked to you! Most people see you as a salesperson and they have a nega-
tive emotional response to all salespeople.Therefore, in most cases, you are
a bad salesperson when you walk in the door.You haven’t opened your
mouth or asked any questions and you are already a bad salesperson.
Ready for more?
When you walk out the door your client is going to think differently
of you but by the next time you talk with your client his brain will be
back in bad salesperson mode for two reasons. First, he will confront many
other idiots posing as salespeople between now and then. Second, his past
emotional memories are not going to be wiped away by a fun one-hour
meeting with you!
Therefore, you must become an expert at altering time.You must be-
come a master of moving people through time so that they are not af-
fected by their past programming and emotions.You must be able to get
them to look at your product and service from a completely different per-
spective! And you can.
Time plays a big role in people’s decision-making processes.There
are three fundamental ways that people experience time: past, present,
and future.
Past: Some people live in the past or use the past as their guidepost for
all decisions they will make in the present and future.These people are of-
ten cynical and depressed.They also make fewer bad decisions than other
people.Their guard is up and they will make fewer errors because of this.
They will also miss out on opportunities because of their experiences.You
will need to remember this!
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I was ripped off once before doing this.
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I ate at a place like this once and it was terrible.
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I got conned the last time I bought a car.
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I never get a good deal.
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The stock market always goes down when I invest.
These are all common experiences for people who process all infor-
mation through filters of the past.
Present: Some people live in the present moment.These people tend to
have much less stress and to give little thought to the past or future.They
tend to be lousy planners and to seek instant gratification. Usually their
credit cards are maxed out because they have sacrificed a future they can-
not see for the pleasure of the moment.They think like this:
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I know it’s right when I feel it.
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I do what feels good.
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I just wanted to have fun.
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It looks like fun so I’m going to do it.
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I never thought I’d get pregnant.
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Who’d have thought I’d lose all that money?
Future: Some people filter most of their thoughts in terms of the fu-
ture.They tend to live in the future, delay instant gratification, and have
determined that the past, for better or worse, isn’t that relevant for them.
People who live in the future are constantly planning, organizing, prepar-
ing, and sacrificing.They sacrifice the moment for a brighter tomorrow.
They think like this:
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I could buy a car now but that money is better off invested.
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I’ll wait for retirement.
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I could buy that now but I’d like to watch that money build up
over time.
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I better not do that because I might get pregnant.
Once you know how people generally filter their information you can
have them look at different events in the past, present, or future or you can
change the perspective from which they are looking.
You can change someone’s time perspective with some linguistic ma-
neuvers that rival the martial arts.
Client: “Look what happened to the market this past year. It went to
hell. Dropped by 50 percent.Why would I want to invest in your
mutual funds?”
Salesperson: “You might not want to. But the next time the market
doubles or triples wouldn’t you want just a little piece of that for
your future?”
Client: “My experience is that I listen to a salesperson and I get
ripped off.”
Salesperson: “When you go out 10 years into the future and look back,
what do you do right to correct that?”
Client:“Last three times I bought a big yellow pages ad I lost my butt.”
Salesperson: “I understand. If we can create an ad that will pull in the
future will you be up for that?”
Client: “I tried hypnosis before and it doesn’t work.”
Salesperson: “So you had someone who didn’t know what they were
doing.If you were to work with someone who was adept at his art
and knew how to help you, would you be willing to do that?”
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Time when selling your prod-
ucts or services? Be specific.
3. Law of Contrast
When two things, people, or places that are relatively different from each
other are placed near to each other in time,space,or thought,we see them
as more different, and it is easier to distinguish which one we want more.
There is a wonderful piece of television history from the archives of
the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. Carson hosted the Tonight Show for
almost 30 years. One night, Johnny had the number-one Girl Scout
cookie salesperson in the country on. He asked her the secret of her suc-
cess. She said, “I just went to everyone’s house and said, ‘Can I have a
$30,000 donation for the Girl Scouts?’When they said ‘No,’ I said,‘Would
you at least buy a box of Girl Scout cookies?’”The audience couldn’t stop
laughing and neither could Johnny.The little girl had mastered the contrast
principle, at age eight.
Have you ever walked through a grocery store and watched people take
two competing products and put one of them in each hand, then look at
them side by side,literally weighing which one they should buy? The princi-
ple that guides people in this product choice is called the Law of Contrast.
Psychological studies have shown that people can use the Law of
Contrast in a very specific and predesigned fashion. If you can show your
expensive product or service first and then show what you would like to
sell (what you think creates the best win-win with your client) second,the
client is very likely to purchase the second item.
When you were a child you would go into a store with one of your
parents and as Mom shopped, so did you.You may have picked up two or
three items to propose to your mother for possible purchase.Time after
time Mom programmed into you either one of two themes:
1. They’re too expensive—you can’t have either of them.
2. You can have the little (cheapest) one.
You soon learned that the best method of selling Mom was to note
how little the item cost.“Mom, it’s only a dollar,” your voice would res-
onate in a pleading fashion.With the proper eye contact and pitiful face
the strategy regularly worked.
The Law of Contrast doesn’t say that you will always sell the less ex-
pensive of two products. It does say that if you put two products or ser-
vices close together in space,in time,or in a person’s mind,the person will
begin to clearly see the differences and their programming will help them
choose “which” instead of “whether or not to.” Price was the most com-
mon programming installed into most of us as children, but there defi-
nitely were many parents who programmed the theme “it’s junk—don’t
buy garbage” into their children.These adult clients now buy higher-qual-
ity items when possible.The Law of Contrast acts within each of us to help
us choose which of a number of items to buy.
Real Estate
Show your client a home that they not like first then show them a home
that meets all of their buying criteria second. People tend to buy what
they are shown or experience second.
Financial Products
Tell your clients you have two products to show them.The best financial
fit for your clients to own is a diversified portfolio of mutual funds.You
first show them an expensive annuity product and then follow that with a
brief explanation of another option, that of owning mutual funds that re-
quire a smaller investment and offer easier access should they need their
money.The better product and lower price both come second in this case,
creating a compelling unconscious urge to invest in the mutual funds.
Clothing
Once the client has agreed on buying the suit or dress, now present a tie, a
scarf, a new pair of shoes, or a nice necklace as an absolute must. If the
client has purchased a $400 suit, isn’t a $37 tie a necessary purchase?
Electronics
Your customers have said “yes” to the computer; now you can show them
the extended service plan,a piece of useful or fun software,or an extra bat-
tery for emergencies.These $100 items contrast nicely to the $2,000 they
just spent on the computer and almost seem irrelevant.
A useful rule to remember in any sales situation is that when someone
mentions that your product or service “is too expensive” or “costs too
much,” you respond with a gentle, “Compared to what?” “Compared to
what?” is a question that puts your client’s thoughts into perspective and
allows them to rethink their apparent “no” response. If your client was
heading toward a “no” response, “Compared to what?” may often bring
them back to the “yes” response.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Contrast when selling your
products or services? Be specific.
4. Law of Friends
When someone asks you to do something and you perceive that the
person has your best interests in mind, and/or you would like him/her
to have your best interests in mind, you are strongly motivated to fulfill
the request.
How many times have you experienced someone knocking on your
front door asking you to donate money for some cause? Compare the
number of times you donated to the cause when you knew the person
who asked you to donate in contrast to how often you donated when you
didn’t know the person who asked you to donate.
If you are like most people, you have donated more often when
your neighbor has come to the door asking you to donate.You felt em-
pathy for the person you know who is possibly being put upon by this
charitable requesting.The people who solicited from you less regularly
received fewer donations because they didn’t have that same empathy or
trust.We tend to say “yes” when we know someone or perceive they are
our friends.
In a similar context,most people would never go to a meeting for mul-
tilevel marketing if a friend or acquaintance didn’t ask them to look at this
business opportunity.The greatest strategy a multilevel marketing corpora-
tion can utilize is the “listing of friends and family” strategy as the first con-
tacts in the multilevel marketer’s early days in his new business.These friends
and family are the most likely to say “yes”to actually going to a meeting.
As people develop relationships with their clients they become
friends. Friendships grow and become special, and future sales are all but
assured with the ongoing relationship.
An extremely powerful persuasion tool that few salespeople ever use is
that of pointing out the negative aspects of their products and services.
One of the most effective ways to influence people is to argue against your
own point of view or argue against your own self-interest so that it appears
that you are being unbiased in your proposals.
One group of researchers had a heroin addict tell people that there
should be stricter courts and more severe sentences. The researchers
found the heroin addict to be more credible than others presenting sim-
ilar points of view.This was one of the few instances when people be-
lieved someone who was not perceived as physically attractive.When the
message conflicts with the expectations of your buyer you’ll be perceived
as more serious.This is a powerful point, and when you utilize it with
careful skill you will regularly bring out any minor negative aspects of
your products and services.
Be eager to point out any negative aspects of your proposal. This ac-
complishes two important things. First, it makes you appear far more
trustworthy, and second, it allows your clients to be set at ease as you
are doing their job of finding the drawbacks of the proposal.
Financial Products
Tell your client a story of how you recently helped your family members
with their finances in the same manner that you are going to help your
client.When they understand that they are going to be treated exactly like
family, they perceive you also have their best interests in mind.
Real Estate
Share with your client why you would not buy a specific house.If it is clear
that your client is not interested in the house, and you don’t like it, either,
explain why this house is not something you would recommend your
friends buy and then explain in detail why. This strengthens your bond
with your clients.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Friends when selling your prod-
ucts or services? Be specific.
5. Law of Expectancy
When someone you respect and/or believe in expects you to perform a
task or produce a certain result, you will tend to fulfill this person’s expec-
tation whether positive or negative.
There is a famous study from the 1970s by psychologist, Dr. R.
Rosenthal that reveals that the expectation of one person can radically
alter, both positively and negatively, the actual results of how people will
perform. Students were divided into what teachers were told were
bright and dull groups of students.The students were told nothing.The
group that was made up of supposed high-IQ students performed at an
average of an “A” level in their schoolwork after eight months. The
group that was made up of supposed low-IQ students performed at an
average of a “D” level after eight months. In reality, there was no differ-
ence in the IQs of the students.They were randomly divided into the
groups and the only variable in the study, which was immediately dis-
continued, was the expectation of the teachers involved.
In psychology, the placebo effect is a well-documented and scientifi-
cally measurable response on the part of the body to be healthier (or in the
case of a nocebo, to be sicker) based on expectancy, suggestion, and belief.
In the Korean War, there were thousands of casualties and not enough
morphine to relieve the pain of the suffering soldiers. Medics and doctors
were forced to give sugar pills and the suggestion that the soldiers would
shortly be out of pain.Approximately 25 percent of all soldiers taking the
placebo had their severe pain relieved.
This same level of expectancy is necessary as a belief in yourself about
your abilities to be successful and also about your influential ability with
your clients to win them to your products and services.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Expectancy when selling your
products or services?
6. Law of Consistency
When an individual announces in writing (or verbally to a lesser degree)
that he is taking a position on any issue or point of view, he will strongly
tend to defend that belief regardless of its accuracy even in the face of
overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
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There is much research about “consistency” that you might ini-
tially think isn’t about consistency. I want to bring this to your at-
tention now so that you understand consistency as you never have
before. I want to show you a very important factor of how the
mind operates and how you can construct influential messages
with ease! Consider from Plous (1993) and Stanford University
study cited earlier:
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In a nationwide opinion poll 70 percent of Americans once
gave an opinion about a legislative act that didn’t exist. Some
felt the states should take care of the responsibility; some felt the
government should.
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When asked their opinion on how easy getting a divorce should
be in the United States, 40+ percent more Americans chose the
last option of three regardless of which option was offered last.
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Sales of jams in a store increased 10 times when people could
stop by and sample up to six jams versus those days the store of-
fered 20 options.
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College students reported cheating to be wrong when given the
opportunity to fill out anonymous forms. Even those students re-
porting strong attitudes against cheating on exams immediately
cheated on their exams when given the opportunity.
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When pollsters ask people what is the most important issue facing
the nation people respond with hundreds of different answers that
are completely different and in greatly differing percentages than
when pollsters ask people to choose from a list of options the one
they consider to be the most important issue facing the nation.
When people are asked about such hot topics as nuclear weapons
they respond with opposite opinions depending on how the ques-
tion is phrased.
From these and dozens of other valid and reliable studies you can con-
clude six crucial points:
1. People’s opinions, thoughts, and desires are often molded by the
questions they are asked.
2. People’s thoughts, opinions, and desires are often created in the
moment and have little or no relationship with what they will ac-
tually do or what they will believe later.
3. Many people have beliefs about things that are not real, based on
fictitious questions (like acts of Congress) and not knowledge.
4. Most people are fairly automatic in their behavior. They see a
commercial and because they believe what they see without criti-
cal thought, decide what drink to drink, restaurant to eat at, tax
preparer to use, all based on suggestion.
5. Once most people choose something, write something down, or
say something, whether it makes any sense or not, whether it is in
their best interest or not, they tend to stick with that decision, re-
gardless of how that decision was made.
6. People don’t like cognitive dissonance.Most can’t hold two oppos-
ing thoughts in their minds, so they simply pick the thought/deci-
sion/belief they currently hold and eliminate the rest without
further consideration.
All of this is part and parcel of the Law of Consistency.
Your clients’ past decisions and public proclamations dramatically in-
fluence their beliefs and attitudes. Once people have publicly said, “I’ll
never X,” they normally never do. Many people make public statements
that they have not thought out that often turn into beliefs and permanent
attitudes.The reason is simple.We are taught that our word is our bond.
When we say something you can count on us.
Did you know that 70 percent of all people are the same religion they
were raised in as children? This is the Law of Consistency in real-life ac-
tion! People respect consistency and predictability.
A recent research study had subjects make decisions among various
choices.
Group A was asked to “remember their decision.”
Group B was asked to “write their decisions on a magic slate and then
pull the sheet up,‘erasing’ their decision.”
Group C was asked to write down their decisions on paper with ink
and hand them in to the researchers.
Which group stuck with their decisions? Right. Group C stuck with
their decisions more than three-quarters of the time.
Group B kept their decisions half the time, and Group A tended to
change their minds.The lesson is to get your client to write things down as
he participates in the sales process. He could write down anything from
goals for the coming year to what he would really like in a car, a house, a
stock portfolio,or a vacation time-share package.The key is to get a pen in
the client’s hand and have him write!
Never ask a question that will pin the client down to a permanent
“no” response.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Consistency in selling your prod-
ucts or services?
7. Law of Association
We tend to like products, services, and ideas that are endorsed by other
people we like and respect.
Tell me, what is it that Michael Jordan knows about underwear that
I don’t? Didn’t Michael sign a $40,000,000 deal with Calvin Klein to
do a few commercials about underwear? Now, it’s my opinion that I
know as much about underwear as Michael Jordan and I would have
shot those commercials for half what he got! But Kevin Hogan is a
name known in the field of selling. Michael Jordan is a name known
throughout the world. Michael Jordan was paid two cents for every per-
son on earth who knew his name. If I were paid two cents for every
person who knew my name, I’d get paid about $7,000. That is why
Michael Jordan got paid $40,000,000.
Calvin Klein paid $40,000,000 to link one of the world’s most loved
and best-known people to its product.Underwear.That is what the Law of
Association is all about.
When your products and your services are linked to credible, lik-
able, positive-image people, your client will tend to like the products
and services.
For years authors have known that the best way to sell a book is to get
people to write favorable testimonials for the dust jacket and front matter
of the book.This adds credibility to the book because we respect the peo-
ple who wrote the quotes.
The power of a testimonial or of someone famous using your products
or services can be the key that unlocks the doors of the unconscious mind.
If you do not have the ability to have the famous endorse your products or
services, ask other people who are using your services to write you a short
letter testifying to the fact that your product or service has helped them
change their life or their business, or made some significant difference that
they didn’t have before.
The testimonial speaks volumes about you so you don’t have to.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Association in selling your prod-
ucts or services?
8. Law of Scarcity
When a person perceives that something he might want is limited in
quantity, he believes the value of what he might want to be greater than if
it were available in abundance.
What the public finds valuable never ceases to amaze us. Remember
the bizarre Christmas season of 1996? This was when advertisers promoted
Tickle Me Elmo dolls to children and then, to drive the price up, simply
refused to produce the dolls in quantity.The prices of the dolls grew outra-
geous. Stores sold out of the dolls after creating huge demand and over-
pricing them. Within weeks, the Minneapolis Star Tribune printed six and
seven columns of classified ads placed by people offering to sell their Tickle
Me Elmos for anywhere from $300 all the way up to $695!
Imagine this:A mother and child go into the store when the dolls first
come out and Mom buys her child a doll for $30.Eventually the media pro-
motes these dolls to the point where stores and shopping centers are flooded
with people trying to find Tickle Me Elmos and being forced to settle for
other products in the store for their children’s Christmas presents.The mar-
keting campaign was a bonanza for Tickle Me Elmo,radio station giveaways,
and retailers,and it was all induced by intentional marketing scarcity.
Which of the following should you use as an indication of scarcity?
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Act now!
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Limited supplies!
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One day only!
All of those are common themes in advertising and marketing.Which
works best? “Act now” is third most effective.“One day only” is an effec-
tive theme but doesn’t even compare to “limited supplies.”If you can show
that there are only a few of your products or services available,that is going
to increase their perceived value!
The limited-supply frame almost always goes back to your client’s
childhood. One or two pieces of cake were left and when your client was
four years old he knew that if someone else got the last piece of cake there
would be none for him. It was imperative to attempt to get one of the last
pieces of cake.Scarcity was installed at an early age and has been reinforced
throughout our adult lives.The strings wound into scarcity are very pow-
erful indeed and you should begin to devise methods to use the principle
of scarcity in your daily sales meetings.
Real Estate
In the state of Minnesota in the year 2004,many homes are selling in liter-
ally days. It is completely ethical to tell your clients “The average house in
Minnesota is selling in 31 days. If you want this house, put an offer on pa-
per, now.”
Automobile
“There are only three cars like this on the lot. I suspect they will sell out
by Monday. That doesn’t mean you can’t get this car again, but it does
mean you could wait weeks or months to get a factory-delivered car with
all of these options. It’s up to you.”
Financial Products
“You can never predict the future, but what happens if this January is like
most Januarys and the market goes up 4 percent while you are deciding
whether this is the time to open your IRA?”
Exercise:What is it that your client loses if he doesn’t buy from you? That
is your scarcity point.
9. Law of Conformity
Most people tend to agree to proposals, products, or services that will be
perceived as acceptable by the majority of other people or a majority of
the individual’s peer groups.
Everyone wants to be accepted. “What will people think?” is some-
thing that we all ask ourselves at the unconscious level.We all want to be
liked and we all want people to look at what we buy and do with respect
and admiration.When your client thinks about how his peers will view his
purchase, the sale can be made or broken without going any further.
Therefore it is important to assure your client, at the unconscious level,
that his buying your product or service is an outstanding idea.
Conformity is related to consistency in some ways. Conformity is be-
ing consistent with your peer group’s acceptance. Consistency is being
perceived as predictable and ethical within your peer group and even
within yourself.
Nonconformists and rebels even tend to conform to their groups that
are known to be rebellious against society. Consider that Greenpeace ac-
tivists are very much nonconformists in the eyes of the public, but among
their own group they conform to the nonconformist standard.
Jehovah’s Witnesses and Latter-Day Saints are both Christian sects that
are considered apart from Christianity by other denominations.They are
nonconformists and are proud and honored to be. However, within their
own groups, they have clear-cut and definite standards that must be con-
formed to.Your understanding of your client’s conforming standards can
make or break your sales.
“Imagine how your wife will respond when she sees that you have
gone out and bought her, and really your whole family, a brand-new car!”
“Imagine how your husband will feel when you show him that you
took the initiative to invest in your retirement so his life will be easier—es-
sentially not having to work until he is 77.”
Exercise: What can you say to your clients to appeal to their sense of
conformity?
10. Law of Power
People have power over other people to the degree that they are perceived
as having greater authority, strength, or expertise in contrast to others.
Power comes with authority and charisma. Power is the ability to
change. Power is both real and a perception.Your clients will perceive you
as more powerful if you act with confidence but not conceit, comfort but
not disregard,and certainty but not knowing it all.Power is something that
exists within you and must be brought out. Once people perceive you as
competent,caring,knowledgeable,confident,and certain,then their confi-
dence level in you goes up.
If you attempt to use power over other people, instead of with other
people, then you will lose sales and lose friends. Power with people is per-
ceived by most as strength and is often called charisma. Power over others
is normally resented and people are less likely to conform if they think you
are trying to control them.
One recent study that discussed power and authority revealed that 95
percent of all nurses were willing to dispense drugs to patients, after being
authorized by physicians, that they knew would indeed likely kill the pa-
tient.That’s power.
When you are selling a product,it is assumed you are the expert.If you
know everything there is to know about your product you become the go-
to guy. Subtly make sure your client knows you are the best or among the
best in your company.People like to deal with the guy at the top.
Auto mechanics may not have a high recognition value for power, but
when your car breaks down,they become the most powerful people in the
world, don’t they? They have the solution to your problem. If they made
the solution appear easy they would have no power.The simple fact that
most people are ignorant of how to utilize power is why many of them are
perceived as beggars or nuisances.
Exercise:What are three subtle ways you can let your client know you are
among the top people with regard to knowledge, client service, and/or
sales in the company? How can you show your client that you are not just
another salesperson?
ing traffic, and even keep to the speed limit (at least when you see a high-
way patrolman!).These are all simple laws. Laws created by society for the
safety and betterment of the masses aren’t necessarily perfect, nor are they
absolutes. Laws of society don’t always work.
However, universal laws like the law of gravity always work. If you
drop 10,000 baseballs off the top of the Sears Tower in Chicago, the balls
will all drop to the street below, probably doing major damage. None of
the balls will rise up toward the atmosphere as you drop them off the
Sears Tower.
These are universal laws that never change. If you try to break a uni-
versal law, normally you won’t get a second chance to make things right!
Legislated laws are different. If you follow them you will probably live
longer and pay fewer traffic tickets.
The laws of influence aren’t quite like the laws of society or the laws
of the universe. In fact, most people aren’t even aware of the laws of influ-
ence.They simply tend to act in accordance with the laws at a completely
unconscious level.There are major prices to pay when the laws of influ-
ence are broken.The problem is that most people aren’t aware of the laws
in the first place.If people unconsciously follow the rules they will be hap-
pier and communicate well with others. If people don’t follow the rules
they will run into lots of problems, experience broken relationships, earn
less income, be more readily downsized in corporations that are cutting
back, and—well, you get the idea.
There is nothing you do that is more important than communicat-
ing with others. There are very specific laws that govern not only the
communication process but also the sales process. It’s interesting because
sometimes when you drive past the highway patrolman at 75 mph you
don’t get a ticket. Sometimes you fail to yield to oncoming traffic and
you don’t get in a car accident. Every now and then you run the stop
sign and you don’t hit a pedestrian. The laws exist, though, and when
they are followed they tend to work in favor of law-abiding citizens.
When they are broken, the chances that something will go wrong are
dramatically increased. The same is true in this respect for the laws of
influence.
How can there be laws of selling? How can something like sales or
communication have laws? As our species has evolved for millions of years
we have discovered that we tend to need the cooperation of others to suc-
ceed. Gaining the cooperation and compliance of other people is ab-
solutely critical to the persuasion process and the continuance of society as
we know it.
In this chapter you will learn how to apply the 10 Laws of Influ-
ence. Following each of these rules is important in gaining compliance
from others. In most situations on most days of your sales career, if you
follow each law you will find selling to be a fairly simple experience.
What’s better, if you utilize these 10 laws in all of your communication
you will find that your sales career is fun, sometimes challenging, and al-
ways rewarding.
1. Law of Reciprocity
When someone gives you something of perceived value, you immediately
respond with the desire to give something back.
It’s December 24 and the mail has just arrived.You open a Christmas
card from someone you had taken off your Christmas list.This is a crisis!
“Honey, are there any more Christmas cards left?”
“Yeah, in the drawer.”
“Thank God.”You go to the drawer and sure enough there is a card
there—but there are no envelopes to fit the card into! You search and
search,finally deciding to use an envelope that isn’t quite large enough . . .
but you have to use something!
You sign the card, and yes, you personalize it! (You write something
special just for the sender.) You stuff the card into the envelope that is still
too small.You slide a picture of the family in, and you even find a leftover
newsletter that tells everyone what your family has been up to all year.
“I’ll be back in a while, I have to go to the post office and mail this
card.”
Why do you have to go to the post office?
You have to go because the letter must be mailed with a postmark be-
fore Christmas! December 24 will show that you cared. December 26 will
show that these people were an afterthought in your mind, not worthy of
sending a card to before Christmas.You race off to the post office—and
you have just discovered the power of reciprocity.
You were taught to share your toys and your snacks and your space
and your time with all those around you.You were scolded when you
were selfish and you were rewarded with kind smiles and pats on the
head when you shared.The Law of Reciprocity was installed at a very
early age.
The world’s greatest people and marketing mavens give something to
their clients—and I don’t mean a business card.
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Have you ever received a bar of soap in the mail?
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Have you ever received a box of cereal in the mail?
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Have you ever received return address labels from a charity in the
mail?
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Have you ever received a handful of greeting cards from a charity in
the mail?
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Have you ever received a sample-size shampoo bottle in the mail?
These are all examples of what we call “inducing reciprocity.” The
practice is very simple, yet absolutely brilliant. If your product is top qual-
ity and it is something that everyone can use,send everyone a small sample
of it, and they will be more likely to buy it the next time they go to the
store for two reasons.
First, they will recognize it as something they have used. The brain
picks up on what is familiar. (Have you ever noticed how many cars there
are like yours on the road? What happened to all the rest?!)
Second, reciprocity has been induced when someone gives you some-
thing and you give them something back. Reciprocity has also been in-
duced when someone gives you something and you feel compelled to give
something back.Kellogg’s was nice enough to send us their free box of ce-
real, and because it tasted good we should at least buy their cereal this one
time.We return the favor.
Reciprocity, based on scientific research, appears to be the single most
powerful law of selling persuasion there is, but is there a problem?
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If you sell life insurance, you can’t give away $10,000 of free cover-
age.
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If you sell real estate, you can’t give away bathrooms.
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If you sell speaking services you can’t give away free speeches.
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If you are a stockbroker you can’t give away 100 shares of Mi-
crosoft.
What do you do if you don’t have sample-size products or services?
How do you take advantage of this powerful law of share and share
alike?
You do not have to give away free samples to utilize reciprocity.You
must only give away something that has perceived value. My favorite
method of inducing reciprocity is taking someone to lunch or sharing a
valuable tip related to building their business or income in some way. (I
like these approaches because they are measurable and the person knows
that you really helped them when they follow through on your sugges-
tion.) Taking someone to lunch is usually an inexpensive way to induce
reciprocity, and you have the added benefit of meeting one of your client’s
16 basic desires (the desire to eat). Sharing helpful secrets that are truly
specialized knowledge is also an elegant way to induce reciprocity. One
simple idea can often help someone earn hundreds or thousands of dollars
per year more in income.
Can I share a secret with you?
I keep some of my money in the Strong Funds Money Market ac-
count. It pays much more interest than a bank does and the money is safe.
You can write checks on your account just like a checking account, and if
you just used that secret to make more money, I’d be happy that I shared it
with you.
Can I share another secret with you? The Strong Advantage Fund is
even better! It pays about 1 to 3 percent more interest than the Strong
Money Market Fund and you can write checks on that account, too. If
you took $10,000 out of the bank or CD and put it into the Strong Ad-
vantage Fund you would earn 2 to 3 percent more interest per year on that
money than you do in the bank or CD. Now, granted that only comes to
about $300 per year, but how many free copies of this book can you give
away to your friends in return for that one $300 gift? How will your
friends feel about you when you give them the most cutting-edge selling
power ever put into one book?
Here are a few creative ideas for people to use as inexpensive giveaway
items.
Life Insurance and Financial Products
Give away a free report that lists all of the top-performing investments for
the past three years (even if it contains information that is positive about
your competitors!).Give away a handy chart that people can place on the re-
frigerator that shows the 10 questions to ask telemarketers to determine the
legitimacy of investment opportunities and requests for charitable donations.
Real Estate
Estimate the dollar of the loan the client will take out and run several
amortization tables showing how small extra payments each month will
cut years off the life of the loan,save the client tens of thousands of dollars,
and create long-term financial freedom. If the client is already putting
every penny toward the 30-year mortgage, give away a handy booklet that
shows how to do simple maintenance on the house, how to find good ser-
vice people to work on the home in the future, and how to keep the
home in top-dollar condition should they decide to sell.
Automobile
If you sell a great car, give away a recent Consumer Reports article compar-
ing your car with others in its class. If you sell a car that is a good car but
not listed as one of the best,give away a list of the top 10 strategies to keep
the car running cheaply and its resale value high.
The message to you is that everyone can give something away for free
with nothing expected in return. It is a scientific fact that reciprocity is
effective.The key is that what you give away must have perceived value
on the part of the client.Traditional promotional items like personalized
pens and date books may be useful or they may not be.You can test them
to see if they assist in making sales. It doesn’t matter what your giveaway
actually costs you.What matters is the value the client places on the item,
report, or product.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Reciprocity when selling your
products or services? Be very specific.
2. Law of Time
Changing someone’s time perspective helps them to make different deci-
sions.When people change their time perspective they change how they
feel about something and the decisions they make in regard to it.
Time is the subtle equalizer in life. No matter how rich or poor you
are,time is the one commodity that is the same for everyone.Everyone has
this moment of experience only. What happens in this moment is nor-
mally not a matter of conscious choice or thought.
Quite often when you walk into a client’s office or you contact them
in some other way they will immediately equate you, at the unconscious
level,with all of the other people they have ever met.In all probability they
have more negative experiences than positive experiences with people.
Two things need to happen.You must distinguish yourself from all the
other people they’ve known, and you need to move their time filter from
the past to the present or future. People have emotional responses that are
attached to various stimuli.You are a stimulus.You trigger positive or neg-
ative experiences in all of your clients’ minds whether or not each client
knows it. What’s more interesting is that this response isn’t necessarily
linked to you! Most people see you as a salesperson and they have a nega-
tive emotional response to all salespeople.Therefore, in most cases, you are
a bad salesperson when you walk in the door.You haven’t opened your
mouth or asked any questions and you are already a bad salesperson.
Ready for more?
When you walk out the door your client is going to think differently
of you but by the next time you talk with your client his brain will be
back in bad salesperson mode for two reasons. First, he will confront many
other idiots posing as salespeople between now and then. Second, his past
emotional memories are not going to be wiped away by a fun one-hour
meeting with you!
Therefore, you must become an expert at altering time.You must be-
come a master of moving people through time so that they are not af-
fected by their past programming and emotions.You must be able to get
them to look at your product and service from a completely different per-
spective! And you can.
Time plays a big role in people’s decision-making processes.There
are three fundamental ways that people experience time: past, present,
and future.
Past: Some people live in the past or use the past as their guidepost for
all decisions they will make in the present and future.These people are of-
ten cynical and depressed.They also make fewer bad decisions than other
people.Their guard is up and they will make fewer errors because of this.
They will also miss out on opportunities because of their experiences.You
will need to remember this!
I
I was ripped off once before doing this.
I
I ate at a place like this once and it was terrible.
I
I got conned the last time I bought a car.
I
I never get a good deal.
I
The stock market always goes down when I invest.
These are all common experiences for people who process all infor-
mation through filters of the past.
Present: Some people live in the present moment.These people tend to
have much less stress and to give little thought to the past or future.They
tend to be lousy planners and to seek instant gratification. Usually their
credit cards are maxed out because they have sacrificed a future they can-
not see for the pleasure of the moment.They think like this:
I
I know it’s right when I feel it.
I
I do what feels good.
I
I just wanted to have fun.
I
It looks like fun so I’m going to do it.
I
I never thought I’d get pregnant.
I
Who’d have thought I’d lose all that money?
Future: Some people filter most of their thoughts in terms of the fu-
ture.They tend to live in the future, delay instant gratification, and have
determined that the past, for better or worse, isn’t that relevant for them.
People who live in the future are constantly planning, organizing, prepar-
ing, and sacrificing.They sacrifice the moment for a brighter tomorrow.
They think like this:
I
I could buy a car now but that money is better off invested.
I
I’ll wait for retirement.
I
I could buy that now but I’d like to watch that money build up
over time.
I
I better not do that because I might get pregnant.
Once you know how people generally filter their information you can
have them look at different events in the past, present, or future or you can
change the perspective from which they are looking.
You can change someone’s time perspective with some linguistic ma-
neuvers that rival the martial arts.
Client: “Look what happened to the market this past year. It went to
hell. Dropped by 50 percent.Why would I want to invest in your
mutual funds?”
Salesperson: “You might not want to. But the next time the market
doubles or triples wouldn’t you want just a little piece of that for
your future?”
Client: “My experience is that I listen to a salesperson and I get
ripped off.”
Salesperson: “When you go out 10 years into the future and look back,
what do you do right to correct that?”
Client:“Last three times I bought a big yellow pages ad I lost my butt.”
Salesperson: “I understand. If we can create an ad that will pull in the
future will you be up for that?”
Client: “I tried hypnosis before and it doesn’t work.”
Salesperson: “So you had someone who didn’t know what they were
doing.If you were to work with someone who was adept at his art
and knew how to help you, would you be willing to do that?”
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Time when selling your prod-
ucts or services? Be specific.
3. Law of Contrast
When two things, people, or places that are relatively different from each
other are placed near to each other in time,space,or thought,we see them
as more different, and it is easier to distinguish which one we want more.
There is a wonderful piece of television history from the archives of
the Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. Carson hosted the Tonight Show for
almost 30 years. One night, Johnny had the number-one Girl Scout
cookie salesperson in the country on. He asked her the secret of her suc-
cess. She said, “I just went to everyone’s house and said, ‘Can I have a
$30,000 donation for the Girl Scouts?’When they said ‘No,’ I said,‘Would
you at least buy a box of Girl Scout cookies?’”The audience couldn’t stop
laughing and neither could Johnny.The little girl had mastered the contrast
principle, at age eight.
Have you ever walked through a grocery store and watched people take
two competing products and put one of them in each hand, then look at
them side by side,literally weighing which one they should buy? The princi-
ple that guides people in this product choice is called the Law of Contrast.
Psychological studies have shown that people can use the Law of
Contrast in a very specific and predesigned fashion. If you can show your
expensive product or service first and then show what you would like to
sell (what you think creates the best win-win with your client) second,the
client is very likely to purchase the second item.
When you were a child you would go into a store with one of your
parents and as Mom shopped, so did you.You may have picked up two or
three items to propose to your mother for possible purchase.Time after
time Mom programmed into you either one of two themes:
1. They’re too expensive—you can’t have either of them.
2. You can have the little (cheapest) one.
You soon learned that the best method of selling Mom was to note
how little the item cost.“Mom, it’s only a dollar,” your voice would res-
onate in a pleading fashion.With the proper eye contact and pitiful face
the strategy regularly worked.
The Law of Contrast doesn’t say that you will always sell the less ex-
pensive of two products. It does say that if you put two products or ser-
vices close together in space,in time,or in a person’s mind,the person will
begin to clearly see the differences and their programming will help them
choose “which” instead of “whether or not to.” Price was the most com-
mon programming installed into most of us as children, but there defi-
nitely were many parents who programmed the theme “it’s junk—don’t
buy garbage” into their children.These adult clients now buy higher-qual-
ity items when possible.The Law of Contrast acts within each of us to help
us choose which of a number of items to buy.
Real Estate
Show your client a home that they not like first then show them a home
that meets all of their buying criteria second. People tend to buy what
they are shown or experience second.
Financial Products
Tell your clients you have two products to show them.The best financial
fit for your clients to own is a diversified portfolio of mutual funds.You
first show them an expensive annuity product and then follow that with a
brief explanation of another option, that of owning mutual funds that re-
quire a smaller investment and offer easier access should they need their
money.The better product and lower price both come second in this case,
creating a compelling unconscious urge to invest in the mutual funds.
Clothing
Once the client has agreed on buying the suit or dress, now present a tie, a
scarf, a new pair of shoes, or a nice necklace as an absolute must. If the
client has purchased a $400 suit, isn’t a $37 tie a necessary purchase?
Electronics
Your customers have said “yes” to the computer; now you can show them
the extended service plan,a piece of useful or fun software,or an extra bat-
tery for emergencies.These $100 items contrast nicely to the $2,000 they
just spent on the computer and almost seem irrelevant.
A useful rule to remember in any sales situation is that when someone
mentions that your product or service “is too expensive” or “costs too
much,” you respond with a gentle, “Compared to what?” “Compared to
what?” is a question that puts your client’s thoughts into perspective and
allows them to rethink their apparent “no” response. If your client was
heading toward a “no” response, “Compared to what?” may often bring
them back to the “yes” response.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Contrast when selling your
products or services? Be specific.
4. Law of Friends
When someone asks you to do something and you perceive that the
person has your best interests in mind, and/or you would like him/her
to have your best interests in mind, you are strongly motivated to fulfill
the request.
How many times have you experienced someone knocking on your
front door asking you to donate money for some cause? Compare the
number of times you donated to the cause when you knew the person
who asked you to donate in contrast to how often you donated when you
didn’t know the person who asked you to donate.
If you are like most people, you have donated more often when
your neighbor has come to the door asking you to donate.You felt em-
pathy for the person you know who is possibly being put upon by this
charitable requesting.The people who solicited from you less regularly
received fewer donations because they didn’t have that same empathy or
trust.We tend to say “yes” when we know someone or perceive they are
our friends.
In a similar context,most people would never go to a meeting for mul-
tilevel marketing if a friend or acquaintance didn’t ask them to look at this
business opportunity.The greatest strategy a multilevel marketing corpora-
tion can utilize is the “listing of friends and family” strategy as the first con-
tacts in the multilevel marketer’s early days in his new business.These friends
and family are the most likely to say “yes”to actually going to a meeting.
As people develop relationships with their clients they become
friends. Friendships grow and become special, and future sales are all but
assured with the ongoing relationship.
An extremely powerful persuasion tool that few salespeople ever use is
that of pointing out the negative aspects of their products and services.
One of the most effective ways to influence people is to argue against your
own point of view or argue against your own self-interest so that it appears
that you are being unbiased in your proposals.
One group of researchers had a heroin addict tell people that there
should be stricter courts and more severe sentences. The researchers
found the heroin addict to be more credible than others presenting sim-
ilar points of view.This was one of the few instances when people be-
lieved someone who was not perceived as physically attractive.When the
message conflicts with the expectations of your buyer you’ll be perceived
as more serious.This is a powerful point, and when you utilize it with
careful skill you will regularly bring out any minor negative aspects of
your products and services.
Be eager to point out any negative aspects of your proposal. This ac-
complishes two important things. First, it makes you appear far more
trustworthy, and second, it allows your clients to be set at ease as you
are doing their job of finding the drawbacks of the proposal.
Financial Products
Tell your client a story of how you recently helped your family members
with their finances in the same manner that you are going to help your
client.When they understand that they are going to be treated exactly like
family, they perceive you also have their best interests in mind.
Real Estate
Share with your client why you would not buy a specific house.If it is clear
that your client is not interested in the house, and you don’t like it, either,
explain why this house is not something you would recommend your
friends buy and then explain in detail why. This strengthens your bond
with your clients.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Friends when selling your prod-
ucts or services? Be specific.
5. Law of Expectancy
When someone you respect and/or believe in expects you to perform a
task or produce a certain result, you will tend to fulfill this person’s expec-
tation whether positive or negative.
There is a famous study from the 1970s by psychologist, Dr. R.
Rosenthal that reveals that the expectation of one person can radically
alter, both positively and negatively, the actual results of how people will
perform. Students were divided into what teachers were told were
bright and dull groups of students.The students were told nothing.The
group that was made up of supposed high-IQ students performed at an
average of an “A” level in their schoolwork after eight months. The
group that was made up of supposed low-IQ students performed at an
average of a “D” level after eight months. In reality, there was no differ-
ence in the IQs of the students.They were randomly divided into the
groups and the only variable in the study, which was immediately dis-
continued, was the expectation of the teachers involved.
In psychology, the placebo effect is a well-documented and scientifi-
cally measurable response on the part of the body to be healthier (or in the
case of a nocebo, to be sicker) based on expectancy, suggestion, and belief.
In the Korean War, there were thousands of casualties and not enough
morphine to relieve the pain of the suffering soldiers. Medics and doctors
were forced to give sugar pills and the suggestion that the soldiers would
shortly be out of pain.Approximately 25 percent of all soldiers taking the
placebo had their severe pain relieved.
This same level of expectancy is necessary as a belief in yourself about
your abilities to be successful and also about your influential ability with
your clients to win them to your products and services.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Expectancy when selling your
products or services?
6. Law of Consistency
When an individual announces in writing (or verbally to a lesser degree)
that he is taking a position on any issue or point of view, he will strongly
tend to defend that belief regardless of its accuracy even in the face of
overwhelming evidence to the contrary.
I
There is much research about “consistency” that you might ini-
tially think isn’t about consistency. I want to bring this to your at-
tention now so that you understand consistency as you never have
before. I want to show you a very important factor of how the
mind operates and how you can construct influential messages
with ease! Consider from Plous (1993) and Stanford University
study cited earlier:
I
In a nationwide opinion poll 70 percent of Americans once
gave an opinion about a legislative act that didn’t exist. Some
felt the states should take care of the responsibility; some felt the
government should.
I
When asked their opinion on how easy getting a divorce should
be in the United States, 40+ percent more Americans chose the
last option of three regardless of which option was offered last.
I
Sales of jams in a store increased 10 times when people could
stop by and sample up to six jams versus those days the store of-
fered 20 options.
I
College students reported cheating to be wrong when given the
opportunity to fill out anonymous forms. Even those students re-
porting strong attitudes against cheating on exams immediately
cheated on their exams when given the opportunity.
I
When pollsters ask people what is the most important issue facing
the nation people respond with hundreds of different answers that
are completely different and in greatly differing percentages than
when pollsters ask people to choose from a list of options the one
they consider to be the most important issue facing the nation.
When people are asked about such hot topics as nuclear weapons
they respond with opposite opinions depending on how the ques-
tion is phrased.
From these and dozens of other valid and reliable studies you can con-
clude six crucial points:
1. People’s opinions, thoughts, and desires are often molded by the
questions they are asked.
2. People’s thoughts, opinions, and desires are often created in the
moment and have little or no relationship with what they will ac-
tually do or what they will believe later.
3. Many people have beliefs about things that are not real, based on
fictitious questions (like acts of Congress) and not knowledge.
4. Most people are fairly automatic in their behavior. They see a
commercial and because they believe what they see without criti-
cal thought, decide what drink to drink, restaurant to eat at, tax
preparer to use, all based on suggestion.
5. Once most people choose something, write something down, or
say something, whether it makes any sense or not, whether it is in
their best interest or not, they tend to stick with that decision, re-
gardless of how that decision was made.
6. People don’t like cognitive dissonance.Most can’t hold two oppos-
ing thoughts in their minds, so they simply pick the thought/deci-
sion/belief they currently hold and eliminate the rest without
further consideration.
All of this is part and parcel of the Law of Consistency.
Your clients’ past decisions and public proclamations dramatically in-
fluence their beliefs and attitudes. Once people have publicly said, “I’ll
never X,” they normally never do. Many people make public statements
that they have not thought out that often turn into beliefs and permanent
attitudes.The reason is simple.We are taught that our word is our bond.
When we say something you can count on us.
Did you know that 70 percent of all people are the same religion they
were raised in as children? This is the Law of Consistency in real-life ac-
tion! People respect consistency and predictability.
A recent research study had subjects make decisions among various
choices.
Group A was asked to “remember their decision.”
Group B was asked to “write their decisions on a magic slate and then
pull the sheet up,‘erasing’ their decision.”
Group C was asked to write down their decisions on paper with ink
and hand them in to the researchers.
Which group stuck with their decisions? Right. Group C stuck with
their decisions more than three-quarters of the time.
Group B kept their decisions half the time, and Group A tended to
change their minds.The lesson is to get your client to write things down as
he participates in the sales process. He could write down anything from
goals for the coming year to what he would really like in a car, a house, a
stock portfolio,or a vacation time-share package.The key is to get a pen in
the client’s hand and have him write!
Never ask a question that will pin the client down to a permanent
“no” response.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Consistency in selling your prod-
ucts or services?
7. Law of Association
We tend to like products, services, and ideas that are endorsed by other
people we like and respect.
Tell me, what is it that Michael Jordan knows about underwear that
I don’t? Didn’t Michael sign a $40,000,000 deal with Calvin Klein to
do a few commercials about underwear? Now, it’s my opinion that I
know as much about underwear as Michael Jordan and I would have
shot those commercials for half what he got! But Kevin Hogan is a
name known in the field of selling. Michael Jordan is a name known
throughout the world. Michael Jordan was paid two cents for every per-
son on earth who knew his name. If I were paid two cents for every
person who knew my name, I’d get paid about $7,000. That is why
Michael Jordan got paid $40,000,000.
Calvin Klein paid $40,000,000 to link one of the world’s most loved
and best-known people to its product.Underwear.That is what the Law of
Association is all about.
When your products and your services are linked to credible, lik-
able, positive-image people, your client will tend to like the products
and services.
For years authors have known that the best way to sell a book is to get
people to write favorable testimonials for the dust jacket and front matter
of the book.This adds credibility to the book because we respect the peo-
ple who wrote the quotes.
The power of a testimonial or of someone famous using your products
or services can be the key that unlocks the doors of the unconscious mind.
If you do not have the ability to have the famous endorse your products or
services, ask other people who are using your services to write you a short
letter testifying to the fact that your product or service has helped them
change their life or their business, or made some significant difference that
they didn’t have before.
The testimonial speaks volumes about you so you don’t have to.
Exercise: How can you utilize the Law of Association in selling your prod-
ucts or services?
8. Law of Scarcity
When a person perceives that something he might want is limited in
quantity, he believes the value of what he might want to be greater than if
it were available in abundance.
What the public finds valuable never ceases to amaze us. Remember
the bizarre Christmas season of 1996? This was when advertisers promoted
Tickle Me Elmo dolls to children and then, to drive the price up, simply
refused to produce the dolls in quantity.The prices of the dolls grew outra-
geous. Stores sold out of the dolls after creating huge demand and over-
pricing them. Within weeks, the Minneapolis Star Tribune printed six and
seven columns of classified ads placed by people offering to sell their Tickle
Me Elmos for anywhere from $300 all the way up to $695!
Imagine this:A mother and child go into the store when the dolls first
come out and Mom buys her child a doll for $30.Eventually the media pro-
motes these dolls to the point where stores and shopping centers are flooded
with people trying to find Tickle Me Elmos and being forced to settle for
other products in the store for their children’s Christmas presents.The mar-
keting campaign was a bonanza for Tickle Me Elmo,radio station giveaways,
and retailers,and it was all induced by intentional marketing scarcity.
Which of the following should you use as an indication of scarcity?
I
Act now!
I
Limited supplies!
I
One day only!
All of those are common themes in advertising and marketing.Which
works best? “Act now” is third most effective.“One day only” is an effec-
tive theme but doesn’t even compare to “limited supplies.”If you can show
that there are only a few of your products or services available,that is going
to increase their perceived value!
The limited-supply frame almost always goes back to your client’s
childhood. One or two pieces of cake were left and when your client was
four years old he knew that if someone else got the last piece of cake there
would be none for him. It was imperative to attempt to get one of the last
pieces of cake.Scarcity was installed at an early age and has been reinforced
throughout our adult lives.The strings wound into scarcity are very pow-
erful indeed and you should begin to devise methods to use the principle
of scarcity in your daily sales meetings.
Real Estate
In the state of Minnesota in the year 2004,many homes are selling in liter-
ally days. It is completely ethical to tell your clients “The average house in
Minnesota is selling in 31 days. If you want this house, put an offer on pa-
per, now.”
Automobile
“There are only three cars like this on the lot. I suspect they will sell out
by Monday. That doesn’t mean you can’t get this car again, but it does
mean you could wait weeks or months to get a factory-delivered car with
all of these options. It’s up to you.”
Financial Products
“You can never predict the future, but what happens if this January is like
most Januarys and the market goes up 4 percent while you are deciding
whether this is the time to open your IRA?”
Exercise:What is it that your client loses if he doesn’t buy from you? That
is your scarcity point.
9. Law of Conformity
Most people tend to agree to proposals, products, or services that will be
perceived as acceptable by the majority of other people or a majority of
the individual’s peer groups.
Everyone wants to be accepted. “What will people think?” is some-
thing that we all ask ourselves at the unconscious level.We all want to be
liked and we all want people to look at what we buy and do with respect
and admiration.When your client thinks about how his peers will view his
purchase, the sale can be made or broken without going any further.
Therefore it is important to assure your client, at the unconscious level,
that his buying your product or service is an outstanding idea.
Conformity is related to consistency in some ways. Conformity is be-
ing consistent with your peer group’s acceptance. Consistency is being
perceived as predictable and ethical within your peer group and even
within yourself.
Nonconformists and rebels even tend to conform to their groups that
are known to be rebellious against society. Consider that Greenpeace ac-
tivists are very much nonconformists in the eyes of the public, but among
their own group they conform to the nonconformist standard.
Jehovah’s Witnesses and Latter-Day Saints are both Christian sects that
are considered apart from Christianity by other denominations.They are
nonconformists and are proud and honored to be. However, within their
own groups, they have clear-cut and definite standards that must be con-
formed to.Your understanding of your client’s conforming standards can
make or break your sales.
“Imagine how your wife will respond when she sees that you have
gone out and bought her, and really your whole family, a brand-new car!”
“Imagine how your husband will feel when you show him that you
took the initiative to invest in your retirement so his life will be easier—es-
sentially not having to work until he is 77.”
Exercise: What can you say to your clients to appeal to their sense of
conformity?
10. Law of Power
People have power over other people to the degree that they are perceived
as having greater authority, strength, or expertise in contrast to others.
Power comes with authority and charisma. Power is the ability to
change. Power is both real and a perception.Your clients will perceive you
as more powerful if you act with confidence but not conceit, comfort but
not disregard,and certainty but not knowing it all.Power is something that
exists within you and must be brought out. Once people perceive you as
competent,caring,knowledgeable,confident,and certain,then their confi-
dence level in you goes up.
If you attempt to use power over other people, instead of with other
people, then you will lose sales and lose friends. Power with people is per-
ceived by most as strength and is often called charisma. Power over others
is normally resented and people are less likely to conform if they think you
are trying to control them.
One recent study that discussed power and authority revealed that 95
percent of all nurses were willing to dispense drugs to patients, after being
authorized by physicians, that they knew would indeed likely kill the pa-
tient.That’s power.
When you are selling a product,it is assumed you are the expert.If you
know everything there is to know about your product you become the go-
to guy. Subtly make sure your client knows you are the best or among the
best in your company.People like to deal with the guy at the top.
Auto mechanics may not have a high recognition value for power, but
when your car breaks down,they become the most powerful people in the
world, don’t they? They have the solution to your problem. If they made
the solution appear easy they would have no power.The simple fact that
most people are ignorant of how to utilize power is why many of them are
perceived as beggars or nuisances.
Exercise:What are three subtle ways you can let your client know you are
among the top people with regard to knowledge, client service, and/or
sales in the company? How can you show your client that you are not just
another salesperson?
Framing Principles,Persuasion Techniques,and Influential Strategies
More about Framing
“No” often means “no,” but it doesn’t have to! Allow me to keep you in
suspense for just a few moments and let you indulge yourself with an-
other game you can play and compare your results to the majority of
the population:
Situation A: In a game you receive $1,000. In addition, you have a
choice between a certain gain of $500 or a 50 percent chance of
winning an additional $1,000 and a 50 percent chance of winning
nothing.Which do you choose?
Situation B: In a game you receive $2,000. In addition, you have a
choice between a certain loss of $500 or a 50 percent risk of los-
ing $1,000 and a 50 percent chance of losing nothing.Which do
you choose?
Before you read on, please do make your choice.
These are the situations that Kahneman,Slovic,and Tversky (1982) pre-
sented to hundreds of subjects. Situations A and B are 100 percent identical,
but most people choose differently in each situation because of the framing.
In both situations you are deciding whether you want $1,500 guaranteed or
have a 50–50 chance of ending up with either $1,000 or $2,000.
How do most people respond?
In situation A, 84 percent of people choose the certain $1,500 (the
first option). Only 16 percent gamble on the 50–50 chance of ending up
with either $1,000 or $2,000.
In Situation B, 31 percent of people choose the certain $1,500 (the
first option).A full 69 percent are willing to gamble on the 50–50 chance
of ending up with either $1,000 or $2,000.
The situations are 100 percent identical yet the frame makes all the
difference in the world as to how people decide.
Question: Examine the two frames (situations) carefully.What is the differ-
ence between the frames and why do you think people choose the way
they do? How might you utilize your hypotheses in your own interactions?
Here are a few lessons we learn from research that examines frames
and choices:
Lesson A: People do not necessarily decide what is best for them; they
decide what presentation of facts is more attractive.
Lesson B: Because we all succumb to the presentation of facts (and
fallacies) and not to reality itself, we all need to look at any important
decisions from all points of view.
Lesson C: People will lock in a sure gain in favor of any risk in the future,
but they will let their losses run.(Example:People hold a stock to-
day at 10 that they bought at 70 because they have so much in the
stock.This is one of the stupidest things people do.They should
take the money and invest in the instrument that holds the highest
probability of appreciation.)
Let’s move this to a more real-world scenario and see how the way
people think causes them to make bad decisions, and how you can influ-
ence them to do what is in their best interest once they blow it.
Scenario 1
You see a brand-new car that you have been drooling over for months.It’s
priced $500 below invoice an offers a $2,000 rebate! But because money
has been tight,you decide against buying the car.Three months later,your
financial situation has improved and you see the same car still priced at
$500 below invoice but the rebate program ended last month. Do you
buy the car?
If you are like most people the answer is “no.”Why would that be? You
can get a car at below invoice (That’s supposedly what the dealer pays for
the car, not the retail price on the car!) The reason is that most individuals
experience what is called “avoidance of anticipated counterfactual regret.”
In simple English,that means that if we bought the car now,we would feel
as if we had missed out on last month’s bargain and don’t want to regret it.
To avoid that pain, people will continue to pass up great opportunities,
even though they aren’t quite as great as “the one that got away.”
However,if you drive past the dealership every day on your way to the
office, the repeated exposure to the car is often enough to overcome the
inertia of inaction and allow you to change your mind and buy the car.
You’re going to be seeing what you could have had every single day, and
therefore you are experiencing regrets of another kind anyway, so you be-
come more likely to stop back and buy the car.
Now, if you can understand this you can influence others to your way
of thinking in ways you have never dreamed of.
I
You’ve met with a client or customer and given them a grand op-
portunity, which they declined. How can you stay in front of that
customer over the weeks and months so they ultimately will do
business with you? (Out of sight = out of mind.)
How can you change an offer or restructure an offer so that the
client/customer feels as if they are getting the same original price
on something and therefore does not need to psychologically avoid
buying from/saying “yes” to you?
Scenario 2
Another example might be a TV that you know retails for more than
$600. In the Sunday paper you see it on sale for $397 but it’s for one day
only. It’s a super bargain if you ever saw one, but you decide against it for
some reason.The following Sunday the set is still on sale but this time for
$497.You missed the first opportunity for some reason or other and now
you have an opportunity to still get the TV at a big discount . . . and of
course you don’t buy it because you will feel the loss of the $100 that you
would have saved had you purchased it last week!
The research of this phenomenon shows that inaction inertia occurs
when the second action opportunity is in some sense worth substantially
less than the initial opportunity, even though the current action opportu-
nity has positive value in an absolute sense. (Tykocinski 1998)
Therefore, once a customer or potential customer/client says “no” to you, you
must develop a strategy to overcome inaction inertia or you will lose this client forever.
How can you structure your initial offer so that it is a tremendous
value while allowing the customer to feel the perception of a similar
tremendous value later . . . if they say “no” to you now?
In the case of the TV, perhaps you might include a service contract at
no cost.This costs the company next to nothing and is quoted at $80 to
the customer.
In the case of the automobile, you could offer to do 18 months of free
oil changes and tune-ups.Total value could be as much as $500 and the
real cost is next to nothing because a tune-up might not be needed, espe-
cially in the first year and a half, and the cost of oil and a filter is negligible
compared to the profits on the automobile sale.
A person of influence must preclude the “no” reaction in the first
place.The best way to do this is by utilizing tools of anticipated regret that
overcome resistance.
Publishers Clearing House has done this for years. (Many would say
unethically and I might not argue about that.) Here’s how it has used an-
ticipated regret in its mailings in the past:
Suppose we told you . . . you were recently assigned the winning su-
per prize number, but you didn’t enter so we gave the $10,000,000
to somebody else! Deciding not to enter our sweepstakes is serious
business.
That’s pretty powerful stuff, isn’t it?
Asking a person to engage in counterfactual thinking means you are
having someone consider alternate realities that could be true had some-
one done some other set of actions. Counterfactual thinking generally is
related to regret, and Publishers Clearing House has mastered the concept
of regret in marketing, as you can see!
Here is your homework assignment that will help you build your
powers of influence.
1. List four specific ways that you can utilize anticipated regret with
your products and services.
2. List four specific ways you can keep your product/service/ideas in
front of your prospects who have temporarily said “no” to you.
3. Write down how you normally frame your offers and see if there
are other ways that you can frame your offers to make them more
appealing.
Foot in the Door:A Proven Persuasion Strategy
That Leads to “Yes!”
(Bonus:This is a free $10,000 Key that I have shared with numerous com-
panies. It’s now yours free for reading. Use it wisely.)
You can’t persuade someone if you can’t get in front of them to com-
municate your message. For hundreds and thousands of years businesses,
merchants, therapists, and salespeople have used the foot in the door
(FITD) technique to gain access to the person who can say “yes.” Does it
really work as well as salespeople think?
You already know that every persuasion and influence strategy that
works in selling works in therapy, works in marketing—well, you get the
idea.We tend to say “yes” or “no” based on the interaction of certain mea-
surable variables.
I favor any strategy in the field of influence that is tested and proven to
be effective. I want to share two powerful techniques that increase your
chances of getting the result you want: the foot in the door (FITD) tech-
nique and the amendment technique.
FITD Technique
The foot in the door technique is a simple concept.The idea is to get your
client/customer to say “yes” to a simple and small request immediately be-
fore you ask for a big “yes.”
Remember the old days when an encyclopedia salesman would come
to the door offering a free three-book set of a thesaurus, dictionary, and
grammar book if you simply listened to his presentation about his ency-
clopedias? I do. I still have the Britannica in the office.This is the perfect
example of the foot in the door technique.You ask your client/customer
to say “yes” to a small request so that you can have an opportunity to ask
your customer to say “yes” to a large request.
Effective?
More than you know!
Foot in the door strategies are the strategies that have sold billions of
dollars of time-sharing (one of the worst investments you can make—
though it can be fun!). How? Most resorts will ask you to give them 90
minutes of your time in exchange for a free television, tickets to Disney
World or a free weekend at the resort.The 90 minutes they want is a struc-
tured high-pressure presentation designed for the person who has prede-
termined that “There is no way that we will buy.”The strategy has been
effective for decades.
Pharmaceuticals are getting their foot in the door in a positively bril-
liant fashion now. Instead of having doctors give away free samples, many
pharmaceutical companies are having the doctor give the patient a free
prescription coupon redeemable at the pharmacy and all the doctor has to
do is write the prescription.The pharmaceutical wins big because not only
is the prescription written but it is at the pharmacy where all that needs to
be done is call in for a refill when the prescription is used up. Absolute
brilliance that didn’t always work when the M.D. was giving free samples
to the patient.
All of this sounds good, but what does the research reveal?
Research shows that using FITD can increase compliance in many situations
by as much as 200 percent! Here are a few facts that have been discovered:
1. The larger the first request that is agreed to, the more likely the
person/company is to say “yes” to the second and more important request.
$10,000 Gift for You. (I’ve gotten paid $5,000 for this on more than
one occasion.)
This was borne out with one company I consulted with that used
coupons to discover which coupons would draw more people and what
the retention rate of each coupon was.The discovery was that the higher
the price paid on the first coupon, the larger the retention rate.The lower
price/greater discount on the coupon had a much higher usage rate but a
much lower retention rate. Read this 10 times and calculate the implica-
tions for your situation!
2. Do not use money to induce compliance to the first request.When this is
done, the foot in the door technique does not work.
In other words, don’t offer someone money as an inducement to do
business with you or to buy your product/service.
3. The receiver of the foot in the door must actually do something, not say
they will do something, for FITD to be effective. (Burger 1999)
Always remember:What people say and think they will do bears little
relationship to their actual actions.It’s not that people are ill willed or have
bad intentions;people simply are lousy predictors of their future actions.In
fact, simply go with this:What people say they are going to do is relatively
meaningless. Observe what people have done in the past and you can pre-
dict what they will do in the future with greater accuracy than by asking
what they intend to do in the future.
4. If the request has some prosocial aspects (Dillard, Hunter, and Burgoon
1984) people are sometimes significantly more likely to comply than in situations
that are clearly for profit only.
The foot in the door technique is one of the most powerful persua-
sion techniques, and there are reams of research studies in the literature
that prove this beyond a shadow of a doubt. It’s time to start putting to-
gether a plan on some level as to how you and your business/company can
utilize the FITD technique!
Exercise: How can you apply the foot in the door technique to your spe-
cific persuasion scenarios?
Four Tested Ways to Be More Persuasive with Framing
1. Get something of yours (your product, your idea, your service) that has
value into your customers’ hands/minds as soon as possible! As soon as someone
possesses something, they perceive it to be more valuable than they did
immediately prior to owning it.
Research by Kahneman and Tversky (1984) brings these examples to
our attention:
I
Individuals who ultimately bet on team A in a football game are of-
ten ambivalent as to which team to select until they actually place
their bets on team A.Once they have placed their bets,they tend to
dramatically favor team A and show little hesitation in sharing their
certainty that team A will win.
I
Students receive mugs in a research setting and are given the oppor-
tunity to sell the mugs. Other students are given the opportunity to
buy the mugs. Students will not take less than $7.12 on average for
the mugs they have taken possession of.The other students will not
pay more than $3.12 on average for the same mugs. Lesson: Once
you own something you value it more highly than those who do
not own it—even if it has been owned for only 10 minutes!
2. Create a frame (a word picture in your customer’s mind) that your product/
service/idea is something that they already possess . . . so that it becomes the
status quo in their thinking:“Once our lawn service is yours we help you
eliminate all that crabgrass that the old services you used to use never were
able to control.”
I
Students in one class were given a decorated mug as compensation
for filling out a questionnaire. In another class, students received a
large bar of Swiss chocolate.When given the opportunity to trade
with members of the other class, only 10 percent of students traded
their item while 90 percent stayed with what they had.
I
More impressive: 45 students received a gift package of a Stanford
calendar and a free dinner at MacArthur Park Restaurant. In an-
other group of 45, the students received a Stanford calendar and a
certificate for an 8 × 10 professional portrait. Later that day all the
subjects were told they could trade their current package for either
two free dinners at MacArthur Park Restaurant or a professional
portrait sitting including an 8 × 10, two 5 × 7’s, and a wallet photo.
The results were that 81 percent of the dinner/calendar group
swapped their package for the two dinners.
Lesson: People want what they have and more of it!
3. Create a word picture that creates a moderate amount of tension if the client
doesn’t do business with your company. In other words, what will the clients
lose if they do not do business with you?
I
Research:In one experiment with gambling,individuals were given
the opportunity to flip a coin and bet $10. Only with a payoff of
$25 and a possible loss on the individual’s part of $10 were most
willing to gamble! That’s a 2.5:1 ratio for a 1:1 bet!
I
Research on real-life applications: Loss aversion is more pro-
nounced for personal safety than for money. (People will do more
to protect themselves than their money.) Loss aversion is more pro-
nounced for income than leisure. (Losing a chance to travel isn’t as
powerful as losing income.)
Lesson: People move away from loss. Determine what people lose if
they don’t do business with you and artfully develop word pictures that
clarify the hurt they might experience. For example,“You are seven times
more likely to become disabled than die in any given year, and if you be-
come permanently disabled your family will lose everything because you
will be unable to work and they will have the added expense of taking care
of you. If you carry insurance against this enormous risk, you avoid losing
everything and have the ability to maintain a high standard of living no
matter what happens to you.”
4. Don’t confuse opportunity costs with out-of-pocket expenses.Your cus-
tomer doesn’t and is watching you to see how you promote your
business. The following research was conducted in two cities by tele-
phone sampling:
Scenario 1. A shortage has developed for a certain popular make of au-
tomobile, and customers must now wait two months for delivery.
The dealer has been selling the cars at list price. Now the dealer
prices the cars at $200 over list. Is this acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 29%.
Unfair 71%.
Scenario 2: A shortage has developed for a certain popular make of au-
tomobile, and customers must now wait two months for delivery.
The dealer has been selling the cars at $200 below list price. Now
the dealer sells this model at list price. Is this acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 58%.
Unfair 42%.
Scenario 3: A company is making a small profit. It is located in a city
experiencing a recession with substantial unemployment but no
inflation.The company decides to decrease wages and salaries this
year by 7 percent.Acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 37%.
Unfair 63%.
Scenario 4: A company is making a small profit. It is located in a city
experiencing a recession with substantial unemployment and in-
flation of 12 percent.The company decides to increase salaries by
only 5 percent this year.Acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 78%.
Unfair 22%.
Each pair of scenarios presents two is identical situations. (Scenarios 1
and 2 both involve a price rise of $200; scenarios 3 and 4 both involve
wages 7 percent below the inflation rate.) However, the consumer reacts
very differently to each option. Consumers do not want to perceive
money coming out of their pockets. Be certain to frame every promotion
in such a way that the consumer is clearly saving (and assume no mathe-
matical ability on the part of the consumer).
Mastering the Science of Influence: Priming the Pump
Do these four thought exercises with friends,groups (best!),or on your own.
1. Read this scenario:
John is intelligent,industrious,impulsive,critical,stubborn,and jealous.
Mark is jealous,stubborn,critical,impulsive,industrious,and intelligent.
Quickly, which person do you think you would like more, John
or Mark?
You have a lot of company if you said John. Most people do, and the
reason is simple.Although the same traits were used to describe John and
Mark, the principle of primacy primes the mind to filter everything else
you learn about someone through the first characteristic, that of being in-
telligent in John’s case and jealous in Mark’s case As each characteristic is
mentioned in order, it becomes less and less important.
2. Guesstimate the total of each of these multiplication problems. Show the
first equation to one person and the second equation to another.Each per-
son gets only five seconds.
1 × 2 × 3 × 4 × 5 × 6 × 7 × 8 = ?
8 × 7 × 6 × 5 × 4 × 3 × 2 × 1 = ?
The average guess for the first problem is 512. For the second? 2,250.
The correct answer is 40,320!
Why the big difference in guessing and the huge distance in both cases
from the right answer? People group the first few numbers together in
each set and then guessed based on this information.
3. Group 1 (or person 1 if you are doing this with only two friends) is shown
these words and asked to remember them:“adventurous,”“self assured,”“indepen-
dent,” and “persistent.”
Group 2 is shown this set of words and asked to remember them:
“careless,”“conceited,”“solitary,” and “stubborn.”
Now, each has 15 seconds to describe and evaluate the following per-
son: Donald is a parachutist.
The descriptions given by the individuals or groups will be heavily
slanted toward the words they had to remember. Group 1 typically finds
Donald a free spirit.Group 2 typically finds Donald careless and a daredevil.
$10,000 Key to Influence: Whether you realize it or not, everything you
watch,listen to,read,and think about influences the next thing you consider.
4. Say the following word five times, then continue reading.
“Blood.”
What color does a traffic light have to be to proceed?
Did you say “red?”
Go back and look at the question. Interesting, eh?
These four scenarios all take advantage of our brain’s programming for
primacy.We tend to lose the ability to consider much information after the
first important piece, and in fact we tend to filter or disregard information
that doesn’t match our current information, whether or not the new in-
formation is valuable.
Key to Influence: There is an enormous amount of research, old and
new, that confirms that what happens first in some experience, event, or
situation alters our perceptions of everything that follows.There is also an
equally large amount of research that shows that what happens last in some
experience, event, or situation is extremely important in our perceptions
and beliefs.
Are the two findings in contradiction? No.The brain tends to remember
that which happens first and last in sequences,events,and life in general.The
balance between the two (primacy and recency) is very interesting.One ex-
periment shows that when two speakers are giving speeches one right after
the other with no break,the first speaker tends to be received better and ap-
preciated more. However, when speakers (say candidates for office) can
choose between speaking before a group this week or next week, they
should choose the later event as people (when they go to the polls, say) will
forget what happened last week,and the freshness of this week’s speaker and
her message will ultimately be seen in a much better light.When consider-
ing going first or last, the key determining factor for positioning is the
elapsed time between the events.The shorter the elapsed time,the better it is
to go first.The longer the elapsed time,the better it is to go last.
Let me ask you a few questions, may I?
What was the first school you attended?
What was the second?
Who was the first person you kissed?
Who was the second?
What was the first apartment you rented?
What was the second?
What was the first car you actually owned?
What was the second?
What was your first job?
What was your second?
I think you get the idea!
So, we know we have a hard time remembering things in the middle!
We are good at beginnings and endings. How do we use this enlightening
information?
Priming people to accept a message is all about starting out with a
great impression—something big, a promise, a big smile, something that
sets the stage for everything that can happen later. Remember that what
happens first will be remembered and will serve as a filter for everything
that comes after.
Quick! Get a pen and paper.
Choose which you prefer (you’re making monetary bets). Circle or
write down your choice.
Alternative A:A sure gain of $240.
Alternative B: A 25 percent chance to gain $1,000, and a 75 percent
chance to gain nothing.
Choose which you prefer:
Alternative C:A sure loss of $750.
Alternative D: A 75 percent chance to lose $1,000, and a 25 percent
chance to lose nothing.
Kahneman and Tversky (1984) found that 84 percent of people
choose alternative A over B.
First Key:When people have a sure thing in hand,they tend not to go for
the potential bigger gain and lose what they have.People hate to lose what
they have.
Second Key: Instead of the sure loss, people will gamble at an even
greater loss for the chance to break even. (This is why casinos have big
chandeliers, big-name acts, and the best hotel rooms on the planet.)
When people feel pain or have experienced loss,they will spend more to get out
of the loss or come out of the pain, even if the odds are against success.
In fact, 73 percent of all people choose the AD combination even
though BC is a better choice (only 3 in 100 will choose that combination)
and the one that is the logical choice.And so it is with our species.We are
a rationalizing people. We make emotional choices and then rationalize
(make them seem logical, whether correct or incorrect).
Third Key: How a question, proposal, idea, product, or statement is
framed can largely determine what the majority of people will decide and
actually do.
Most people respond or react to the fear of loss and the threat of pain
in a much more profound way than they do to the potential for gain.This
does not mean, however, that all of your influential messages should be
couched in the language of fear and threats. Far from it. In fact, in some
situations fear and pain will turn someone away from your attempted per-
suasive communication.
Once you begin to understand when it is appropriate to use prohibi-
tions, losses, and fear in your message and when it is appropriate to use al-
lowances, gains, and positive messages, you will find yourself influentially
succeeding in ways you didn’t think were possible.
We pride ourselves on being in charge, in control, intelligent, great-
decision making beings . . . until we are exposed to the truth. Sigh. . . .We
often respond to others in ways that make absolutely no rational sense
whatsoever. Becoming aware of most of these mechanisms of stimulus/re-
sponse, environment/response, frame/response, perception/response will
help you become a superb decision maker and open the door for you to
become a remarkably influential person.
What about educated people? Medical doctors? How do they decide
what to do, and how will they influence your decision?
A 1987 study in the New England Journal of Medicine involving 1,193
participants revealed this:
Which of two treatments would specialists prefer—surgery or radia-
tion therapy for cancer? It depended on how the question was asked!
If the medical specialists were asked the question in terms of “surgery
will yield a 68 percent chance of surviving after one year,”then three-quar-
ters of the time surgery was chosen.If the question was asked in the mortal-
ity (death) frame (32 percent will be dead by the end of one year), then
only 58 percent of the time did the specialists choose the surgery option.
Fourth Key: The frame of a proposal can alter life-and-death decisions
even though the identical data is used to make the decisions!
Hypnotic Confusion
Milton Erickson, M.D., was one of the twentieth century’s best-known
hypnotherapists.
Erickson utilized the tactic of confusing his patients so they would go
into a trance and be distracted from resistant thoughts they would have to-
ward Erickson or hypnosis in general. Erickson believed that whatever
suggestion followed the confusing tactic he would use would be more
likely to take hold and succeed.
Some hypnotic confusion techniques have proven to be counterpro-
ductive and actually increase resistance, but simple disruptions followed
by an elegantly simple reframe actually have been proven to be successful
in influence.
Example 1:The Cupcake Study
People coming to the Psychology Club table on campus used the follow-
ing answers in response to the question “How much are they?”
Control:“These cupcakes are 50 cents; they’re really delicious.”
Mild disruption:“These half cakes are 50 cents;they’re really delicious.”
Severe disruption:“These petits gâteaux are 50 cents;they’re really delicious.”
What worked for making sales?
Mild disruption: 74 percent.
Severe disruption: 67 percent.
Control: 46 percent.
Does this work with anything other than students selling cupcakes?
Example 2:The Donation Study
Students asking for donations to their Richardson Center asked people to
donate “some money” in the control and “money some” (just those two
words in their door-to-door presentation) in the disruption condition.
A third condition was tested using “money some”and the name of the
organization incorrectly stated as “Center Richardson.”This was a severe
disruption.
Results:
Disruption: 65 percent of houses donated.
Control: 30 percent of houses donated.
Severe disruption: 25 percent of houses donated.
Exercise: How can you use the technique of hypnotic confusion in selling
your idea or product (or yourself). List three ways.
The Amendment Technique
There are different ways we can present our price to our client. Look at
the following two ways.
1. “These cupcakes are 50 cents.”
2. “These cupcakes used to be a dollar, but now they’re 50 cents.”
What difference can that little bit of wording make? A big difference.The
sentence you want to use,of course,is the second one.We are telling our cus-
tomer that we have amended the price.The power is in its startling the client
with the original price,and then revealing the new reasonable price.
How can we use this data to our advantage? You tell your customer
that your bicycles were $129.95 each, but now they’re $ 99.95! People ap-
preciate knowing how much something did cost, and what is a reasonable
amount for that product today.
Bonus: Price Points
In the United States,we think of money in terms of our standard currency.
We have $1, $5, $10, $20, $50, and $100 bills.These are all what we call
“price points.”A price point is a point at which going over that price will
make our customer hesitate, or even refuse to buy.
The most common ones are $.99, $9.95, $19.95, and $99.95.
What about $20,000? A car for $19,995 is much cheaper than one for
$20,195, right?
Exercise: How can you use the amendment technique in your business
today? List three ways. How can you take advantage of price points in
your industry?
How Most People Make Bad Decisions . . .
How You Can Help Them Make Good Ones!
Our life experience is largely a combination of our state of mind, com-
munication, relationships, actions, and decisions. If someone is to achieve
success in some area of life, certainly making well-considered decisions is
critical. Learning how you make decisions and how others make their de-
cisions will not only allow you to become a more influential person, it
will help you grow yourself—with fewer regrets and more wins!
Is it time for a career change?
Which job should you take?
Should you marry this one?
Should you divorce this one?
Should you buy this car?
Should you buy that home?
Before you make that big decision you may want to read this set of ar-
ticles, which will shed light on not only our decision-making blind spots
and errors, but also how to actually make great decisions.
Reams of research show that in general:
I
People assume when they decide on something and it turns out
well that they made a good decision—when it easily could have
been attributed to chance (luck).
I
People tend to overemphasize the importance of pain by about
2.5:1 in decision making. (People may not need to feel great but
they don’t want to hurt at all.)
I
People rationalize their emotional decisions instead of making ra-
tional decisions.
I
People make their decisions emotionally when the answer to a
question or proposition isn’t obvious.
I
People make their decisions impulsively,then stand by their impulse
as if the decision was made rationally.
I
People make their decisions based on their experience and not the
experience of the masses.
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People make decisions based on the socioenvironmental frames
they put the decisions into. (A woman going to Planned Parent-
hood for counseling will get different advice than the woman going
to her conservative pastor.)
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People tend to make decisions on their own instead of seeking the
counsel of numerous others who can give additional perspectives.
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People are unaware of the enormous power of the actual words that
are used to ask the question, and how the phrasing can make an
enormous difference in the actual decision that is made.
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People are unaware as to how the influence of specific questions
changes their minds unconsciously. (“Are you sick of driving that
old junker?” versus “Are you thinking of buying a new car?”)
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People tend to avoid what they perceive as risky.
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People tend to lack the skills to calculate the chances that events
will or won’t happen.
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People tend to decide on the sure thing even when it doesn’t make
real sense to do so.They will take a sure $100 instead of a 50–50
chance at $250, for example.)
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People tend to make decisions without a solid understanding of
“the real-life likelihood of events.” (Read that as mathematics, sta-
tistics, and probability.)
Not only do most of us make lots of bad decisions, we also tend to
dramatically overrate our decision-making skills! We tend to remember
our good decisions and think we’re actually good at decision making.
But wait! It gets worse! We tend to overestimate everything about our-
selves from the income we earned last year to the grades we got in ele-
mentary school. Here are just a couple of examples of how people
perceive their judgment in the real world to be in contrast to how it
really is.
Ninety-six percent of all men rate their physical appearance as average
or better!
Ninety-four percent of all women rate their physical appearance as av-
erage or better!
What’s wrong with this picture? (Obviously only 51 percent are aver-
age or better.The other 49 percent are below average.)
Ninety-one percent of all business leaders believe they are good or
very good decision makers.
Eighty percent of businesses fail in the first four years.
Ninety percent of new products fail to make a profit.
What is wrong with this picture?!
Now, with these amazing facts behind us, it would seem that seeking
expert advice from your broker, your agent, your attorney, your therapist,
or your mom would be helpful (maybe), but don’t get too excited until
you look at this:
Here’s an example of how we tend to overrate expert advice:
About 20 percent of all stock mutual fund managers select stocks that
ultimately do better than the S&P 500 index, often called “the market.” In
other words, only 20 percent of experts—people paid millions of dollars
per year to beat the market—succeed at doing so.Think about that. Given
reams of computer analysis, data, and information, a full 80 percent of the
world’s smartest professional investors cannot do better than the person
who claims to know nothing about the market and simply invests in the
500 companies in the S&P 500!
Why are these experts so poor at deciding what stocks to buy?
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Past performance is not always an indicator of future results . . . but
most experts still make investment decisions as though it is.
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Most experts don’t consider the factors that really will influence the
future.
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They believe their own publicity clips.
Almost every decision we make in business, relationships, or life is a
function of probability.That means that you don’t actually know the out-
come of the decision in advance.When you get in your car and drive to
work you are deciding that people will drive carefully on their side of the
road while you speed along at 55 mph on your side of the road with two
painted yellow lines dividing you.And indeed that is a decision that when
you look at it this way is fairly risky but in reality the probability of disas-
ter striking (someone running head-on into you and killing you) is very
slim. In this case, our day-to-day experience and our illusion of control
(we’re driving so everything will be okay) confirm for us that while we see
a lot of accidents, we know that almost everyone is safe driving to and fro.
So we drive.
But the same set of factors can work the opposite way in making
decisions.
Millions of people buy lottery tickets every day. The lottery (like
Powerball) is one of the worst bets on the planet.The odds are 55,000,000
to 1 that you will lose—and, yes, eventually someone has to win, but let’s
put those chances into perspective:If you have been struck by lightning 40
times or have died in 20 plane crashes then you might just be the person
to win the lottery—those are the same odds as winning the jackpot in the
Powerball game! The fact is that you aren’t going to win the lottery and
neither am I. It is a terrible decision to buy a ticket. Just take your dollar
bill or $10 bill and burn it. Feel better? Ouch!
What about the “easier” lotto games? What about games where you
only have to match three numbers to win $500 for your measly $1 invest-
ment? From 000 to 999 there are 1,000 total numbers that can be drawn.
Your odds of winning therefore are 1 in 1,000.That means that on aver-
age for every $1,000 you spend on the lotto you will get returned $500.
You should get $1,000 for a winner but the government/lottery sponsor
is giving you $500. I don’t know how much you earn, but a lot of people
make only $500 per week and it’s worth considering that the govern-
ment, which regulates the lottery, is really extracting a “stupid tax” from
those foolish enough to decide to play. Now, could you pick the winner
tonight in a 1 in 1,000 event and win the $500? Sure you could. Lots of
people will. But it’s still a foolish decision to buy the ticket just because it
could happen.
So how do you make a good decision?
There are lots of factors involved. Dozens actually. Let’s look at one
simple factor and key to making good decisions.
Key to Influence:What is the chance of something happening versus the
payoff? If the payoff is worth more than the risk, then the decision is a
good decision even if you are wrong. If the payoff is worth less than the
risk, the decision is a bad decision, even if you are right.
Example: Last year I won a nice sum of money on the Super Bowl. I
have a modeling tool for picking football games. Some years the model
does better than others. My model said that New England would beat St.
Louis about one-third of the time in this specific game.The casino was of-
fering about $450 for each $100 bet if New England did indeed win. It
was very difficult to put money on New England (because they should
lose two-thirds of the time in this game), but clearly because they should
win one-third of the time (assuming the model is right) and the casino was
willing to pay off more than double those odds, I had no choice but to bet
it all on New England. In other words, according to my model, the casino
should pay off only $200 in addition to getting my $100 back, but it was
offering $450! I had to make the wager. I did.They won. It was good.
Now, New England could have lost and it still would have been a
good bet because the casino was going to pay me more than twice as
much on a win as they should have. It’s no fun when your decision turns
out wrong,but you can learn to make the best decisions possible.We’ll talk
much more about just that in later chapters.
It’s sometimes difficult to calculate the probability of life events.
“If I buy the Palm Pilot will I really use it?”
“Will I be happier if I divorce him?”
“Will I be happier if I go out with Jane instead of Betty?”
“If I quit the job will I find a better one?”
“If I take the job will I be happy there?”
“If I marry Bill/Bonnie, will he/she be a good spouse?”
“If I have children, will they be born free of major defects?”
For these questions it is more difficult to determine what the right de-
cisions are because they include numerous variables that need to be
weighted and all possible options explored before such decisions are final-
ized. (Once a decision is actually made, most humans are unable to change
their minds because they will appear to be wrong in their own minds, to
their peer group, or society in general.)
“No” often means “no,” but it doesn’t have to! Allow me to keep you in
suspense for just a few moments and let you indulge yourself with an-
other game you can play and compare your results to the majority of
the population:
Situation A: In a game you receive $1,000. In addition, you have a
choice between a certain gain of $500 or a 50 percent chance of
winning an additional $1,000 and a 50 percent chance of winning
nothing.Which do you choose?
Situation B: In a game you receive $2,000. In addition, you have a
choice between a certain loss of $500 or a 50 percent risk of los-
ing $1,000 and a 50 percent chance of losing nothing.Which do
you choose?
Before you read on, please do make your choice.
These are the situations that Kahneman,Slovic,and Tversky (1982) pre-
sented to hundreds of subjects. Situations A and B are 100 percent identical,
but most people choose differently in each situation because of the framing.
In both situations you are deciding whether you want $1,500 guaranteed or
have a 50–50 chance of ending up with either $1,000 or $2,000.
How do most people respond?
In situation A, 84 percent of people choose the certain $1,500 (the
first option). Only 16 percent gamble on the 50–50 chance of ending up
with either $1,000 or $2,000.
In Situation B, 31 percent of people choose the certain $1,500 (the
first option).A full 69 percent are willing to gamble on the 50–50 chance
of ending up with either $1,000 or $2,000.
The situations are 100 percent identical yet the frame makes all the
difference in the world as to how people decide.
Question: Examine the two frames (situations) carefully.What is the differ-
ence between the frames and why do you think people choose the way
they do? How might you utilize your hypotheses in your own interactions?
Here are a few lessons we learn from research that examines frames
and choices:
Lesson A: People do not necessarily decide what is best for them; they
decide what presentation of facts is more attractive.
Lesson B: Because we all succumb to the presentation of facts (and
fallacies) and not to reality itself, we all need to look at any important
decisions from all points of view.
Lesson C: People will lock in a sure gain in favor of any risk in the future,
but they will let their losses run.(Example:People hold a stock to-
day at 10 that they bought at 70 because they have so much in the
stock.This is one of the stupidest things people do.They should
take the money and invest in the instrument that holds the highest
probability of appreciation.)
Let’s move this to a more real-world scenario and see how the way
people think causes them to make bad decisions, and how you can influ-
ence them to do what is in their best interest once they blow it.
Scenario 1
You see a brand-new car that you have been drooling over for months.It’s
priced $500 below invoice an offers a $2,000 rebate! But because money
has been tight,you decide against buying the car.Three months later,your
financial situation has improved and you see the same car still priced at
$500 below invoice but the rebate program ended last month. Do you
buy the car?
If you are like most people the answer is “no.”Why would that be? You
can get a car at below invoice (That’s supposedly what the dealer pays for
the car, not the retail price on the car!) The reason is that most individuals
experience what is called “avoidance of anticipated counterfactual regret.”
In simple English,that means that if we bought the car now,we would feel
as if we had missed out on last month’s bargain and don’t want to regret it.
To avoid that pain, people will continue to pass up great opportunities,
even though they aren’t quite as great as “the one that got away.”
However,if you drive past the dealership every day on your way to the
office, the repeated exposure to the car is often enough to overcome the
inertia of inaction and allow you to change your mind and buy the car.
You’re going to be seeing what you could have had every single day, and
therefore you are experiencing regrets of another kind anyway, so you be-
come more likely to stop back and buy the car.
Now, if you can understand this you can influence others to your way
of thinking in ways you have never dreamed of.
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You’ve met with a client or customer and given them a grand op-
portunity, which they declined. How can you stay in front of that
customer over the weeks and months so they ultimately will do
business with you? (Out of sight = out of mind.)
How can you change an offer or restructure an offer so that the
client/customer feels as if they are getting the same original price
on something and therefore does not need to psychologically avoid
buying from/saying “yes” to you?
Scenario 2
Another example might be a TV that you know retails for more than
$600. In the Sunday paper you see it on sale for $397 but it’s for one day
only. It’s a super bargain if you ever saw one, but you decide against it for
some reason.The following Sunday the set is still on sale but this time for
$497.You missed the first opportunity for some reason or other and now
you have an opportunity to still get the TV at a big discount . . . and of
course you don’t buy it because you will feel the loss of the $100 that you
would have saved had you purchased it last week!
The research of this phenomenon shows that inaction inertia occurs
when the second action opportunity is in some sense worth substantially
less than the initial opportunity, even though the current action opportu-
nity has positive value in an absolute sense. (Tykocinski 1998)
Therefore, once a customer or potential customer/client says “no” to you, you
must develop a strategy to overcome inaction inertia or you will lose this client forever.
How can you structure your initial offer so that it is a tremendous
value while allowing the customer to feel the perception of a similar
tremendous value later . . . if they say “no” to you now?
In the case of the TV, perhaps you might include a service contract at
no cost.This costs the company next to nothing and is quoted at $80 to
the customer.
In the case of the automobile, you could offer to do 18 months of free
oil changes and tune-ups.Total value could be as much as $500 and the
real cost is next to nothing because a tune-up might not be needed, espe-
cially in the first year and a half, and the cost of oil and a filter is negligible
compared to the profits on the automobile sale.
A person of influence must preclude the “no” reaction in the first
place.The best way to do this is by utilizing tools of anticipated regret that
overcome resistance.
Publishers Clearing House has done this for years. (Many would say
unethically and I might not argue about that.) Here’s how it has used an-
ticipated regret in its mailings in the past:
Suppose we told you . . . you were recently assigned the winning su-
per prize number, but you didn’t enter so we gave the $10,000,000
to somebody else! Deciding not to enter our sweepstakes is serious
business.
That’s pretty powerful stuff, isn’t it?
Asking a person to engage in counterfactual thinking means you are
having someone consider alternate realities that could be true had some-
one done some other set of actions. Counterfactual thinking generally is
related to regret, and Publishers Clearing House has mastered the concept
of regret in marketing, as you can see!
Here is your homework assignment that will help you build your
powers of influence.
1. List four specific ways that you can utilize anticipated regret with
your products and services.
2. List four specific ways you can keep your product/service/ideas in
front of your prospects who have temporarily said “no” to you.
3. Write down how you normally frame your offers and see if there
are other ways that you can frame your offers to make them more
appealing.
Foot in the Door:A Proven Persuasion Strategy
That Leads to “Yes!”
(Bonus:This is a free $10,000 Key that I have shared with numerous com-
panies. It’s now yours free for reading. Use it wisely.)
You can’t persuade someone if you can’t get in front of them to com-
municate your message. For hundreds and thousands of years businesses,
merchants, therapists, and salespeople have used the foot in the door
(FITD) technique to gain access to the person who can say “yes.” Does it
really work as well as salespeople think?
You already know that every persuasion and influence strategy that
works in selling works in therapy, works in marketing—well, you get the
idea.We tend to say “yes” or “no” based on the interaction of certain mea-
surable variables.
I favor any strategy in the field of influence that is tested and proven to
be effective. I want to share two powerful techniques that increase your
chances of getting the result you want: the foot in the door (FITD) tech-
nique and the amendment technique.
FITD Technique
The foot in the door technique is a simple concept.The idea is to get your
client/customer to say “yes” to a simple and small request immediately be-
fore you ask for a big “yes.”
Remember the old days when an encyclopedia salesman would come
to the door offering a free three-book set of a thesaurus, dictionary, and
grammar book if you simply listened to his presentation about his ency-
clopedias? I do. I still have the Britannica in the office.This is the perfect
example of the foot in the door technique.You ask your client/customer
to say “yes” to a small request so that you can have an opportunity to ask
your customer to say “yes” to a large request.
Effective?
More than you know!
Foot in the door strategies are the strategies that have sold billions of
dollars of time-sharing (one of the worst investments you can make—
though it can be fun!). How? Most resorts will ask you to give them 90
minutes of your time in exchange for a free television, tickets to Disney
World or a free weekend at the resort.The 90 minutes they want is a struc-
tured high-pressure presentation designed for the person who has prede-
termined that “There is no way that we will buy.”The strategy has been
effective for decades.
Pharmaceuticals are getting their foot in the door in a positively bril-
liant fashion now. Instead of having doctors give away free samples, many
pharmaceutical companies are having the doctor give the patient a free
prescription coupon redeemable at the pharmacy and all the doctor has to
do is write the prescription.The pharmaceutical wins big because not only
is the prescription written but it is at the pharmacy where all that needs to
be done is call in for a refill when the prescription is used up. Absolute
brilliance that didn’t always work when the M.D. was giving free samples
to the patient.
All of this sounds good, but what does the research reveal?
Research shows that using FITD can increase compliance in many situations
by as much as 200 percent! Here are a few facts that have been discovered:
1. The larger the first request that is agreed to, the more likely the
person/company is to say “yes” to the second and more important request.
$10,000 Gift for You. (I’ve gotten paid $5,000 for this on more than
one occasion.)
This was borne out with one company I consulted with that used
coupons to discover which coupons would draw more people and what
the retention rate of each coupon was.The discovery was that the higher
the price paid on the first coupon, the larger the retention rate.The lower
price/greater discount on the coupon had a much higher usage rate but a
much lower retention rate. Read this 10 times and calculate the implica-
tions for your situation!
2. Do not use money to induce compliance to the first request.When this is
done, the foot in the door technique does not work.
In other words, don’t offer someone money as an inducement to do
business with you or to buy your product/service.
3. The receiver of the foot in the door must actually do something, not say
they will do something, for FITD to be effective. (Burger 1999)
Always remember:What people say and think they will do bears little
relationship to their actual actions.It’s not that people are ill willed or have
bad intentions;people simply are lousy predictors of their future actions.In
fact, simply go with this:What people say they are going to do is relatively
meaningless. Observe what people have done in the past and you can pre-
dict what they will do in the future with greater accuracy than by asking
what they intend to do in the future.
4. If the request has some prosocial aspects (Dillard, Hunter, and Burgoon
1984) people are sometimes significantly more likely to comply than in situations
that are clearly for profit only.
The foot in the door technique is one of the most powerful persua-
sion techniques, and there are reams of research studies in the literature
that prove this beyond a shadow of a doubt. It’s time to start putting to-
gether a plan on some level as to how you and your business/company can
utilize the FITD technique!
Exercise: How can you apply the foot in the door technique to your spe-
cific persuasion scenarios?
Four Tested Ways to Be More Persuasive with Framing
1. Get something of yours (your product, your idea, your service) that has
value into your customers’ hands/minds as soon as possible! As soon as someone
possesses something, they perceive it to be more valuable than they did
immediately prior to owning it.
Research by Kahneman and Tversky (1984) brings these examples to
our attention:
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Individuals who ultimately bet on team A in a football game are of-
ten ambivalent as to which team to select until they actually place
their bets on team A.Once they have placed their bets,they tend to
dramatically favor team A and show little hesitation in sharing their
certainty that team A will win.
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Students receive mugs in a research setting and are given the oppor-
tunity to sell the mugs. Other students are given the opportunity to
buy the mugs. Students will not take less than $7.12 on average for
the mugs they have taken possession of.The other students will not
pay more than $3.12 on average for the same mugs. Lesson: Once
you own something you value it more highly than those who do
not own it—even if it has been owned for only 10 minutes!
2. Create a frame (a word picture in your customer’s mind) that your product/
service/idea is something that they already possess . . . so that it becomes the
status quo in their thinking:“Once our lawn service is yours we help you
eliminate all that crabgrass that the old services you used to use never were
able to control.”
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Students in one class were given a decorated mug as compensation
for filling out a questionnaire. In another class, students received a
large bar of Swiss chocolate.When given the opportunity to trade
with members of the other class, only 10 percent of students traded
their item while 90 percent stayed with what they had.
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More impressive: 45 students received a gift package of a Stanford
calendar and a free dinner at MacArthur Park Restaurant. In an-
other group of 45, the students received a Stanford calendar and a
certificate for an 8 × 10 professional portrait. Later that day all the
subjects were told they could trade their current package for either
two free dinners at MacArthur Park Restaurant or a professional
portrait sitting including an 8 × 10, two 5 × 7’s, and a wallet photo.
The results were that 81 percent of the dinner/calendar group
swapped their package for the two dinners.
Lesson: People want what they have and more of it!
3. Create a word picture that creates a moderate amount of tension if the client
doesn’t do business with your company. In other words, what will the clients
lose if they do not do business with you?
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Research:In one experiment with gambling,individuals were given
the opportunity to flip a coin and bet $10. Only with a payoff of
$25 and a possible loss on the individual’s part of $10 were most
willing to gamble! That’s a 2.5:1 ratio for a 1:1 bet!
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Research on real-life applications: Loss aversion is more pro-
nounced for personal safety than for money. (People will do more
to protect themselves than their money.) Loss aversion is more pro-
nounced for income than leisure. (Losing a chance to travel isn’t as
powerful as losing income.)
Lesson: People move away from loss. Determine what people lose if
they don’t do business with you and artfully develop word pictures that
clarify the hurt they might experience. For example,“You are seven times
more likely to become disabled than die in any given year, and if you be-
come permanently disabled your family will lose everything because you
will be unable to work and they will have the added expense of taking care
of you. If you carry insurance against this enormous risk, you avoid losing
everything and have the ability to maintain a high standard of living no
matter what happens to you.”
4. Don’t confuse opportunity costs with out-of-pocket expenses.Your cus-
tomer doesn’t and is watching you to see how you promote your
business. The following research was conducted in two cities by tele-
phone sampling:
Scenario 1. A shortage has developed for a certain popular make of au-
tomobile, and customers must now wait two months for delivery.
The dealer has been selling the cars at list price. Now the dealer
prices the cars at $200 over list. Is this acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 29%.
Unfair 71%.
Scenario 2: A shortage has developed for a certain popular make of au-
tomobile, and customers must now wait two months for delivery.
The dealer has been selling the cars at $200 below list price. Now
the dealer sells this model at list price. Is this acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 58%.
Unfair 42%.
Scenario 3: A company is making a small profit. It is located in a city
experiencing a recession with substantial unemployment but no
inflation.The company decides to decrease wages and salaries this
year by 7 percent.Acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 37%.
Unfair 63%.
Scenario 4: A company is making a small profit. It is located in a city
experiencing a recession with substantial unemployment and in-
flation of 12 percent.The company decides to increase salaries by
only 5 percent this year.Acceptable or unfair?
Acceptable 78%.
Unfair 22%.
Each pair of scenarios presents two is identical situations. (Scenarios 1
and 2 both involve a price rise of $200; scenarios 3 and 4 both involve
wages 7 percent below the inflation rate.) However, the consumer reacts
very differently to each option. Consumers do not want to perceive
money coming out of their pockets. Be certain to frame every promotion
in such a way that the consumer is clearly saving (and assume no mathe-
matical ability on the part of the consumer).
Mastering the Science of Influence: Priming the Pump
Do these four thought exercises with friends,groups (best!),or on your own.
1. Read this scenario:
John is intelligent,industrious,impulsive,critical,stubborn,and jealous.
Mark is jealous,stubborn,critical,impulsive,industrious,and intelligent.
Quickly, which person do you think you would like more, John
or Mark?
You have a lot of company if you said John. Most people do, and the
reason is simple.Although the same traits were used to describe John and
Mark, the principle of primacy primes the mind to filter everything else
you learn about someone through the first characteristic, that of being in-
telligent in John’s case and jealous in Mark’s case As each characteristic is
mentioned in order, it becomes less and less important.
2. Guesstimate the total of each of these multiplication problems. Show the
first equation to one person and the second equation to another.Each per-
son gets only five seconds.
1 × 2 × 3 × 4 × 5 × 6 × 7 × 8 = ?
8 × 7 × 6 × 5 × 4 × 3 × 2 × 1 = ?
The average guess for the first problem is 512. For the second? 2,250.
The correct answer is 40,320!
Why the big difference in guessing and the huge distance in both cases
from the right answer? People group the first few numbers together in
each set and then guessed based on this information.
3. Group 1 (or person 1 if you are doing this with only two friends) is shown
these words and asked to remember them:“adventurous,”“self assured,”“indepen-
dent,” and “persistent.”
Group 2 is shown this set of words and asked to remember them:
“careless,”“conceited,”“solitary,” and “stubborn.”
Now, each has 15 seconds to describe and evaluate the following per-
son: Donald is a parachutist.
The descriptions given by the individuals or groups will be heavily
slanted toward the words they had to remember. Group 1 typically finds
Donald a free spirit.Group 2 typically finds Donald careless and a daredevil.
$10,000 Key to Influence: Whether you realize it or not, everything you
watch,listen to,read,and think about influences the next thing you consider.
4. Say the following word five times, then continue reading.
“Blood.”
What color does a traffic light have to be to proceed?
Did you say “red?”
Go back and look at the question. Interesting, eh?
These four scenarios all take advantage of our brain’s programming for
primacy.We tend to lose the ability to consider much information after the
first important piece, and in fact we tend to filter or disregard information
that doesn’t match our current information, whether or not the new in-
formation is valuable.
Key to Influence: There is an enormous amount of research, old and
new, that confirms that what happens first in some experience, event, or
situation alters our perceptions of everything that follows.There is also an
equally large amount of research that shows that what happens last in some
experience, event, or situation is extremely important in our perceptions
and beliefs.
Are the two findings in contradiction? No.The brain tends to remember
that which happens first and last in sequences,events,and life in general.The
balance between the two (primacy and recency) is very interesting.One ex-
periment shows that when two speakers are giving speeches one right after
the other with no break,the first speaker tends to be received better and ap-
preciated more. However, when speakers (say candidates for office) can
choose between speaking before a group this week or next week, they
should choose the later event as people (when they go to the polls, say) will
forget what happened last week,and the freshness of this week’s speaker and
her message will ultimately be seen in a much better light.When consider-
ing going first or last, the key determining factor for positioning is the
elapsed time between the events.The shorter the elapsed time,the better it is
to go first.The longer the elapsed time,the better it is to go last.
Let me ask you a few questions, may I?
What was the first school you attended?
What was the second?
Who was the first person you kissed?
Who was the second?
What was the first apartment you rented?
What was the second?
What was the first car you actually owned?
What was the second?
What was your first job?
What was your second?
I think you get the idea!
So, we know we have a hard time remembering things in the middle!
We are good at beginnings and endings. How do we use this enlightening
information?
Priming people to accept a message is all about starting out with a
great impression—something big, a promise, a big smile, something that
sets the stage for everything that can happen later. Remember that what
happens first will be remembered and will serve as a filter for everything
that comes after.
Quick! Get a pen and paper.
Choose which you prefer (you’re making monetary bets). Circle or
write down your choice.
Alternative A:A sure gain of $240.
Alternative B: A 25 percent chance to gain $1,000, and a 75 percent
chance to gain nothing.
Choose which you prefer:
Alternative C:A sure loss of $750.
Alternative D: A 75 percent chance to lose $1,000, and a 25 percent
chance to lose nothing.
Kahneman and Tversky (1984) found that 84 percent of people
choose alternative A over B.
First Key:When people have a sure thing in hand,they tend not to go for
the potential bigger gain and lose what they have.People hate to lose what
they have.
Second Key: Instead of the sure loss, people will gamble at an even
greater loss for the chance to break even. (This is why casinos have big
chandeliers, big-name acts, and the best hotel rooms on the planet.)
When people feel pain or have experienced loss,they will spend more to get out
of the loss or come out of the pain, even if the odds are against success.
In fact, 73 percent of all people choose the AD combination even
though BC is a better choice (only 3 in 100 will choose that combination)
and the one that is the logical choice.And so it is with our species.We are
a rationalizing people. We make emotional choices and then rationalize
(make them seem logical, whether correct or incorrect).
Third Key: How a question, proposal, idea, product, or statement is
framed can largely determine what the majority of people will decide and
actually do.
Most people respond or react to the fear of loss and the threat of pain
in a much more profound way than they do to the potential for gain.This
does not mean, however, that all of your influential messages should be
couched in the language of fear and threats. Far from it. In fact, in some
situations fear and pain will turn someone away from your attempted per-
suasive communication.
Once you begin to understand when it is appropriate to use prohibi-
tions, losses, and fear in your message and when it is appropriate to use al-
lowances, gains, and positive messages, you will find yourself influentially
succeeding in ways you didn’t think were possible.
We pride ourselves on being in charge, in control, intelligent, great-
decision making beings . . . until we are exposed to the truth. Sigh. . . .We
often respond to others in ways that make absolutely no rational sense
whatsoever. Becoming aware of most of these mechanisms of stimulus/re-
sponse, environment/response, frame/response, perception/response will
help you become a superb decision maker and open the door for you to
become a remarkably influential person.
What about educated people? Medical doctors? How do they decide
what to do, and how will they influence your decision?
A 1987 study in the New England Journal of Medicine involving 1,193
participants revealed this:
Which of two treatments would specialists prefer—surgery or radia-
tion therapy for cancer? It depended on how the question was asked!
If the medical specialists were asked the question in terms of “surgery
will yield a 68 percent chance of surviving after one year,”then three-quar-
ters of the time surgery was chosen.If the question was asked in the mortal-
ity (death) frame (32 percent will be dead by the end of one year), then
only 58 percent of the time did the specialists choose the surgery option.
Fourth Key: The frame of a proposal can alter life-and-death decisions
even though the identical data is used to make the decisions!
Hypnotic Confusion
Milton Erickson, M.D., was one of the twentieth century’s best-known
hypnotherapists.
Erickson utilized the tactic of confusing his patients so they would go
into a trance and be distracted from resistant thoughts they would have to-
ward Erickson or hypnosis in general. Erickson believed that whatever
suggestion followed the confusing tactic he would use would be more
likely to take hold and succeed.
Some hypnotic confusion techniques have proven to be counterpro-
ductive and actually increase resistance, but simple disruptions followed
by an elegantly simple reframe actually have been proven to be successful
in influence.
Example 1:The Cupcake Study
People coming to the Psychology Club table on campus used the follow-
ing answers in response to the question “How much are they?”
Control:“These cupcakes are 50 cents; they’re really delicious.”
Mild disruption:“These half cakes are 50 cents;they’re really delicious.”
Severe disruption:“These petits gâteaux are 50 cents;they’re really delicious.”
What worked for making sales?
Mild disruption: 74 percent.
Severe disruption: 67 percent.
Control: 46 percent.
Does this work with anything other than students selling cupcakes?
Example 2:The Donation Study
Students asking for donations to their Richardson Center asked people to
donate “some money” in the control and “money some” (just those two
words in their door-to-door presentation) in the disruption condition.
A third condition was tested using “money some”and the name of the
organization incorrectly stated as “Center Richardson.”This was a severe
disruption.
Results:
Disruption: 65 percent of houses donated.
Control: 30 percent of houses donated.
Severe disruption: 25 percent of houses donated.
Exercise: How can you use the technique of hypnotic confusion in selling
your idea or product (or yourself). List three ways.
The Amendment Technique
There are different ways we can present our price to our client. Look at
the following two ways.
1. “These cupcakes are 50 cents.”
2. “These cupcakes used to be a dollar, but now they’re 50 cents.”
What difference can that little bit of wording make? A big difference.The
sentence you want to use,of course,is the second one.We are telling our cus-
tomer that we have amended the price.The power is in its startling the client
with the original price,and then revealing the new reasonable price.
How can we use this data to our advantage? You tell your customer
that your bicycles were $129.95 each, but now they’re $ 99.95! People ap-
preciate knowing how much something did cost, and what is a reasonable
amount for that product today.
Bonus: Price Points
In the United States,we think of money in terms of our standard currency.
We have $1, $5, $10, $20, $50, and $100 bills.These are all what we call
“price points.”A price point is a point at which going over that price will
make our customer hesitate, or even refuse to buy.
The most common ones are $.99, $9.95, $19.95, and $99.95.
What about $20,000? A car for $19,995 is much cheaper than one for
$20,195, right?
Exercise: How can you use the amendment technique in your business
today? List three ways. How can you take advantage of price points in
your industry?
How Most People Make Bad Decisions . . .
How You Can Help Them Make Good Ones!
Our life experience is largely a combination of our state of mind, com-
munication, relationships, actions, and decisions. If someone is to achieve
success in some area of life, certainly making well-considered decisions is
critical. Learning how you make decisions and how others make their de-
cisions will not only allow you to become a more influential person, it
will help you grow yourself—with fewer regrets and more wins!
Is it time for a career change?
Which job should you take?
Should you marry this one?
Should you divorce this one?
Should you buy this car?
Should you buy that home?
Before you make that big decision you may want to read this set of ar-
ticles, which will shed light on not only our decision-making blind spots
and errors, but also how to actually make great decisions.
Reams of research show that in general:
I
People assume when they decide on something and it turns out
well that they made a good decision—when it easily could have
been attributed to chance (luck).
I
People tend to overemphasize the importance of pain by about
2.5:1 in decision making. (People may not need to feel great but
they don’t want to hurt at all.)
I
People rationalize their emotional decisions instead of making ra-
tional decisions.
I
People make their decisions emotionally when the answer to a
question or proposition isn’t obvious.
I
People make their decisions impulsively,then stand by their impulse
as if the decision was made rationally.
I
People make their decisions based on their experience and not the
experience of the masses.
I
People make decisions based on the socioenvironmental frames
they put the decisions into. (A woman going to Planned Parent-
hood for counseling will get different advice than the woman going
to her conservative pastor.)
I
People tend to make decisions on their own instead of seeking the
counsel of numerous others who can give additional perspectives.
I
People are unaware of the enormous power of the actual words that
are used to ask the question, and how the phrasing can make an
enormous difference in the actual decision that is made.
I
People are unaware as to how the influence of specific questions
changes their minds unconsciously. (“Are you sick of driving that
old junker?” versus “Are you thinking of buying a new car?”)
I
People tend to avoid what they perceive as risky.
I
People tend to lack the skills to calculate the chances that events
will or won’t happen.
I
People tend to decide on the sure thing even when it doesn’t make
real sense to do so.They will take a sure $100 instead of a 50–50
chance at $250, for example.)
I
People tend to make decisions without a solid understanding of
“the real-life likelihood of events.” (Read that as mathematics, sta-
tistics, and probability.)
Not only do most of us make lots of bad decisions, we also tend to
dramatically overrate our decision-making skills! We tend to remember
our good decisions and think we’re actually good at decision making.
But wait! It gets worse! We tend to overestimate everything about our-
selves from the income we earned last year to the grades we got in ele-
mentary school. Here are just a couple of examples of how people
perceive their judgment in the real world to be in contrast to how it
really is.
Ninety-six percent of all men rate their physical appearance as average
or better!
Ninety-four percent of all women rate their physical appearance as av-
erage or better!
What’s wrong with this picture? (Obviously only 51 percent are aver-
age or better.The other 49 percent are below average.)
Ninety-one percent of all business leaders believe they are good or
very good decision makers.
Eighty percent of businesses fail in the first four years.
Ninety percent of new products fail to make a profit.
What is wrong with this picture?!
Now, with these amazing facts behind us, it would seem that seeking
expert advice from your broker, your agent, your attorney, your therapist,
or your mom would be helpful (maybe), but don’t get too excited until
you look at this:
Here’s an example of how we tend to overrate expert advice:
About 20 percent of all stock mutual fund managers select stocks that
ultimately do better than the S&P 500 index, often called “the market.” In
other words, only 20 percent of experts—people paid millions of dollars
per year to beat the market—succeed at doing so.Think about that. Given
reams of computer analysis, data, and information, a full 80 percent of the
world’s smartest professional investors cannot do better than the person
who claims to know nothing about the market and simply invests in the
500 companies in the S&P 500!
Why are these experts so poor at deciding what stocks to buy?
I
Past performance is not always an indicator of future results . . . but
most experts still make investment decisions as though it is.
I
Most experts don’t consider the factors that really will influence the
future.
I
They believe their own publicity clips.
Almost every decision we make in business, relationships, or life is a
function of probability.That means that you don’t actually know the out-
come of the decision in advance.When you get in your car and drive to
work you are deciding that people will drive carefully on their side of the
road while you speed along at 55 mph on your side of the road with two
painted yellow lines dividing you.And indeed that is a decision that when
you look at it this way is fairly risky but in reality the probability of disas-
ter striking (someone running head-on into you and killing you) is very
slim. In this case, our day-to-day experience and our illusion of control
(we’re driving so everything will be okay) confirm for us that while we see
a lot of accidents, we know that almost everyone is safe driving to and fro.
So we drive.
But the same set of factors can work the opposite way in making
decisions.
Millions of people buy lottery tickets every day. The lottery (like
Powerball) is one of the worst bets on the planet.The odds are 55,000,000
to 1 that you will lose—and, yes, eventually someone has to win, but let’s
put those chances into perspective:If you have been struck by lightning 40
times or have died in 20 plane crashes then you might just be the person
to win the lottery—those are the same odds as winning the jackpot in the
Powerball game! The fact is that you aren’t going to win the lottery and
neither am I. It is a terrible decision to buy a ticket. Just take your dollar
bill or $10 bill and burn it. Feel better? Ouch!
What about the “easier” lotto games? What about games where you
only have to match three numbers to win $500 for your measly $1 invest-
ment? From 000 to 999 there are 1,000 total numbers that can be drawn.
Your odds of winning therefore are 1 in 1,000.That means that on aver-
age for every $1,000 you spend on the lotto you will get returned $500.
You should get $1,000 for a winner but the government/lottery sponsor
is giving you $500. I don’t know how much you earn, but a lot of people
make only $500 per week and it’s worth considering that the govern-
ment, which regulates the lottery, is really extracting a “stupid tax” from
those foolish enough to decide to play. Now, could you pick the winner
tonight in a 1 in 1,000 event and win the $500? Sure you could. Lots of
people will. But it’s still a foolish decision to buy the ticket just because it
could happen.
So how do you make a good decision?
There are lots of factors involved. Dozens actually. Let’s look at one
simple factor and key to making good decisions.
Key to Influence:What is the chance of something happening versus the
payoff? If the payoff is worth more than the risk, then the decision is a
good decision even if you are wrong. If the payoff is worth less than the
risk, the decision is a bad decision, even if you are right.
Example: Last year I won a nice sum of money on the Super Bowl. I
have a modeling tool for picking football games. Some years the model
does better than others. My model said that New England would beat St.
Louis about one-third of the time in this specific game.The casino was of-
fering about $450 for each $100 bet if New England did indeed win. It
was very difficult to put money on New England (because they should
lose two-thirds of the time in this game), but clearly because they should
win one-third of the time (assuming the model is right) and the casino was
willing to pay off more than double those odds, I had no choice but to bet
it all on New England. In other words, according to my model, the casino
should pay off only $200 in addition to getting my $100 back, but it was
offering $450! I had to make the wager. I did.They won. It was good.
Now, New England could have lost and it still would have been a
good bet because the casino was going to pay me more than twice as
much on a win as they should have. It’s no fun when your decision turns
out wrong,but you can learn to make the best decisions possible.We’ll talk
much more about just that in later chapters.
It’s sometimes difficult to calculate the probability of life events.
“If I buy the Palm Pilot will I really use it?”
“Will I be happier if I divorce him?”
“Will I be happier if I go out with Jane instead of Betty?”
“If I quit the job will I find a better one?”
“If I take the job will I be happy there?”
“If I marry Bill/Bonnie, will he/she be a good spouse?”
“If I have children, will they be born free of major defects?”
For these questions it is more difficult to determine what the right de-
cisions are because they include numerous variables that need to be
weighted and all possible options explored before such decisions are final-
ized. (Once a decision is actually made, most humans are unable to change
their minds because they will appear to be wrong in their own minds, to
their peer group, or society in general.)
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